I'm sad today...

[Elizabeth]

...
Somebody somewhere used the term "gender flare". Man, that describes it.
...

I have never heard that term, but it certainly is descriptive of what has happened to me. I have times where my desire to be truly female is overwhelming. Talking about it is really no relief so I don't talk about it much. My circumstance prevents me from transitioning and I have to accept that regardless of if I want to or not.

In re-reading the thread, I noticed that Anita took exception to what I had written about a middle age man attracted to a younger more attractive woman, was in a similar situation. She noted that for herself she needed the relationships with men as a validation of her "girlself" that she did not need as a man.

I believe that what Anita said is true about herself, being a transgendered person. But the middle aged man many times needs the same validation about his "manself". So in that regard, I believe my analogy still holds true. The need for validation still does not justify cheating. Yes, it sucks to have these conflicting feelings, but I believe at times, we all have them.

Love always,
Elizabeth

[DanteCarrie (FTM)]

There are many different people with many different experiences with differing perspectives on themselves as who they are, relations with lovers and what is acceptable. People will often not like your analogies because to them it reads totally differently everybody tries to justify their way of being as right.
Thats fair enough hey. my thing is cheating isn't specifically wrong morally in its self. sleeping with more than one person has no moral implications if you aren't religious. the lying, decietful, betrayal of trust part in cheating can be seen as immoral to your own compass because it is illogical in that you should treat people with respect and always treat someone as you would want to be treated. not because its some christian golden rule but because practically they might kill you in your sleep LOL
also i personally believe ployamory, multiple partners, sleeping with people without love cannot inlove love and is waring and very lonely making in the long run. I do find their to be any excuse for cheating or making your partner feel unloved unless you don't love them because although you should always be true to yourself to an extent the one you love should always come before yourself thats what love is.
naturally this doesn't hold when lovers betray as and let us not be who we are at all because of their own ignorance i would question at this stage if they really love you.
I'm rambling my point i think there is no excuse for cheating regardless of what one needs validating, be it their masculine prowess in the case of older men going for younger girls, be it those with questions of gender validating what part of their personality or validating part of your sexuality either. i think people should be expected to sacrifice some of the shallow frivilous selfish pleasures of life in exchange for being truly loved and they understand that actually they aren't missing that much as their chosen partner fills up so much of that. I'm not saying give up pleasure. true love isn't all purity and boring its very pleasurable.
in conclusion cheating sucks backside and wanting multiple partners should be a fantasy only...........unless you are part of a kinky underground sex society but you're probably going to end up marrying your dominatrix anyway love is a beautiful snare trap.

[DonnaT]

Oh, it's better now. It's a cyclical thing - apparently related to the coming on of the full moon. dunno why.

Nor do I, but my wife has noticed my need to CD increases with the full moon. I hadn't ever paid attention to it before she mentioned it.

[Leeza]

Oh, it's better now. It's a cyclical thing - apparently related to the coming on of the full moon. dunno why.

Although I haven't noticed it maybe it happens to me also.

According to friends that I have that work emerengcy rooms. Full moons can be a night mare.

When I was tending bar there was more trouble on the nights of a full moon and if you really wanted a mess couple a full moon with a major pay day.

Leeza

[Georgia(SO)]

Full moons do something to lots of folks. Last husband was a paramedic and man, they dreaded a full moon on Friday the 13th!