TG Match or dating site for normal people.

[Anne Bonny]

It makes me angry when people assume Oh you must be a pervert or desire an explicitly sexual lifestyle! I just deleted and withdrew from a TS dating site because once I got into it the pictures were explicit and the lifestyles advocated x rated. I am a normal person I just happen to be transgender and am seeking a new life partner who can accept who I am with no problems. I am on a normal dating site but make it plane that I cannot date or try to start meeting anyone until my wife is gone. Does anyone know of reputable TG meeting site for normal people? I suppose I could make it known on my current site that I am tg but - yes...what's the difference? I would be putting it out there either way I suppose. hum...

[SilverLady(SO)]

I am on a normal dating site but make it plane that I cannot date or try to start meeting anyone until my wife is gone.

Anne -

It does not matter how "plain" you make it (unless you plan on taking a plane?) . . . you are still married and you have just said that you must wait until your wife is gone before you can actually date or start meeting anyone.

In that case, why are you even 'advertising' yourself on any dating site right now? Sounds like you're trying to put the cart before the horse.

If I were you, I'd wait until after your wife has actually passed before advertising yourself on any dating sites.



- SL

[Paulette]

Anne, you are in a very difficult situation.

Your wife has lingered on for several years, and may continue to decline for many years to come. That is hard for you if you'd like to socialize. Even harder if you are a cross dresser, or would like to socialize en femme.

Above all, you should be sure of your own desires and intentions.

It is not unusual for heterosexual cross dressers to find, much to their own surprise, that while en femme they are attracted to men, romantically or sexually. This can be dangerous. This is serious stuff.

If, rather than dating, you are looking for companionship or friendship, try local nonprofit organizations whose focus and goals you share. You don't have to advertise that you are a cross dresser. And most such groups are very forgiving and understanding of such gender issues.

And I have to agree with SL here. If you are married and consider yourself monogamous, you should not be advertising your future availability. If you are not monogamous, and can deal with being "unfaithful" without moral or ethical self-hurt, then fine. But it is not to your advantage to tell others that you may not be faithful or that you are looking to the future. It is, at the very least, unseemly. At best, you are demanding a great deal of others regarding their own sensibilities.

Had you previously been polyamorous, then maybe, but only within your already established poly group, and even then very cautiously. But now? It's simply betrayal.

My wife suggests you "man" up, or "woman" up. I agree.

[SilverLady(SO)]

Thank you, Paulette . . . I know we don't often agree on issues but on this one we do!!


- SL

[Anne Bonny]

Thanks to you both. I have often wondered the point of creating a profile and this site allows you to disable it, suppose I will just disable it and wait. No when I feel feminine, it leads me to dress, when I feel masculine there is no desire to wear feminine things or to have anything to do with it, which is most of the time. When dressed I am still heterosexual and desire only women to be with as a partner. I have no desire to be a poligamist. No the most I would do is email...infact I picked up a pen pal like this, very nice lady who knows all about my being transgender, she is a retired hospice nurse who's mother has Alzheimer's Disease, her brother takes care of her and she will fill in to give him a break. I do not see this as any kind of betrayal. I have never hung out with the guys, I prefer being around women or my wife's friends and their spouses before all of this happened. No I will never even now date or have a sexual relationship while my wife lives. Sorry if I gave that impression. When you have no one I am desperate for human contact. There is facebook and I am on there alot but I do not share this side of myself at all. I will take your advice though and go deactivate again on the legitimate dating site. No one has been leaving any messages anyway. It was more of me fiddling with my profile, adding photos, but there again I did not share any of this side of myself. Thanks!

Ok the one remaining dating site is now disabled and will reactivate or start again there once my wife is gone, whenever that is, suppose that leaves facebook and here.