Gender and sexuality

General talk about CD/TGing and gender topics that aren't necessarily fun things we do while en femme, or for gender-driven discussions.

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Anne Bonny
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Gender and sexuality

Post by Anne Bonny »

When my feminine gender is prominent I find myself more passive and submissive and open wanting my partner to lead and be stronger. Women like to deny all of this in their drive for equality of opportunity, pay and advancement and even in marriage - I find nothing at all wrong with any of it. But when it comes to desiring a lover they very much desire the very same thing someone who is intelligent, strong, confident loving and respectful or a gentleman who will be gentle with them. I know this can sound like some kinky CD fiction fantasy but I find when I am feeling feminine this is exactly what I want. I want to be loved I want a woman who is able to be all of those things women normally want in their partner.

When my masculine gender is prominent I fully fulfill the very desires women have of a man who loves them. I can remember when I was young diving onto my wife as we began..... And I believe most of the time a woman can expect me to be a normal husband in that I am intelligent, strong, confident, loving and respectful. I am a gentleman and when masculine am quite attracted to women and find them incredibly pretty and sexy. I am a faithful husband and have been throughout our entire marriage and will be to the end of it. But I am a man.
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Victoria P.
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Re: Gender and sexuality

Post by Victoria P. »

HI Ann, excellent post!

I relate to most of it in that I am a gentleman in male mode and so far only attracted to women though I am noticing pretty CD/TG types.
Having said that as I age I feeling ridiculously feminine IF that is really what we CD/TG types are feeling..........I at least know it is not masculine.

I admire your comment about being faithful which like myself is becoming a rarity these days. I am on many trans sites and it seems
the majority of CD's,TG types seem sleazy or promiscuous,which is NOT how I present,I am a lady at all times and that is my right as it is theirs.

I was always faithful unlike many of my ex girlfriends, but then they noticed femme traits in me that I was unaware of at the time.
My partner of the last 5 years has also noticed many femme traits,again that I was shocked to hear about from her.

I sometimes think some of us CD's (in my case) are in between CD and TS so more towards Transgender,as we perhaps
should have been born female? Maybe it's my upbringing I don't really know,I don't think many do,
so I struggle with this at times still at my grand old age.

Thanks again for a great comment Sweetie

hugs Victoria P xxxx
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Anne Bonny
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Location: The Gulf Coast

Re: Gender and sexuality

Post by Anne Bonny »

I prefer the term gender fluid for myself it is the best descriptor I have ever found. Gender for me is an intense feeling about ourselves and who we are and who we identify with for myself sometimes that is masculine, and sometimes it is feminine. I really do not have much control over which way my gender flows but it does go back and forth. Various things can effect it circumstances, stress, perceptions, life events, opportunity, expectations etc and these may promote or discourage expression of my femm side depending. I find it interesting that I tend to feel more feminine in the morning and that it will last until early afternoon when I change back to being more masculine. I can feel it at other times but that is rather infrequent. It is rare for me to live an entire day in feminine gender, if it goes on for more than a day or two eventually it just seems to run it's course and my masculine gender returns as all feminine desires leave me.

As I have come to understand myself it is not that I am or ever can be a woman. Only women are women and all of who they are comes to them quite naturally and easily...their beauty, their instincts...etc. So I do not see myself in competition with any of that because my gender sometimes flows to the feminine side, my personality is firmly fixed in place, how I think and act and speak...the only difference seems to be this intensity of feeling about myself and an identification with women and who they are...at these times I am in love with the clothing, and I feel as I stated in the previous post.

"I find myself more passive and submissive and open wanting my partner to lead and be stronger. Women like to deny all of this in their drive for equality of opportunity, pay and advancement and even in marriage - I find nothing at all wrong with any of it. But when it comes to desiring a lover they very much desire the very same thing someone who is intelligent, strong, confident loving and respectful or a gentleman who will be gentle with them. I know this can sound like some kinky CD fiction fantasy but I find when I am feeling feminine this is exactly what I want. I want to be loved I want a woman who is able to be all of those things women normally want in their partner.

I am always quite attracted to women and find them incredibly pretty and sexy."

So this is indeed who I am...I am a man who is gender fluid and when my gender flows to the feminine side this is how it is for me.
Go with the flow
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Anne Bonny
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Re: Gender and sexuality

Post by Anne Bonny »

I really like my previous post because it kind of nails it for me...that is who I am. This morning I find myself thinking about the person I am when my gender flows to the Anne side of things. I am a different kind of person.... I am not a woman, not in competition with any of who and what women are where their personality traits and interests tend to be generally as women because my traits and interests are in a different range. I enjoy different things that women do not tend to be interested in yet I certainly when feminine do love wearing pretty things, am more aware of the beauty around me, and my personality traits do shift into a range that is closer to that of the ladies. I find myself more passive and open, willing to get along and I want to be with women because I feel closer to the ladies than I do to the men. Yet...not all the way over...what woman do you know who is excited that they have fixed the lawnmower, or re hung after fixing a cabinet that was sagging? These intangible nebulous varying ever shifting feelings.... Yet there is a difference in my persona when I am feeling feminine. There is a shift that occurs when the gender shifts to the feminine and I am identifying more with women. Hum...openness, aware of the beauty around me and in the clothing I desire to put on, more passive and more interested in feminine things that women tend to be interested in all the time just not all the way fully into their area I suppose.

I am not a man...I am not a woman but I am across the gender line existing on the feminine side...Hum...perhaps it would be a feminine more like women who are crossing over into "Masculine" jobs and roles the difference being I do not tend to drift into being excessively feminine because I am not a woman. I suppose I am more female heavy, or female light depending on which word you like but not woman all the way because being a man I cannot be, I do not have mothering instincts, fluctuating emotions associated with the hormone cycle...guess figuring out my normal persona when I am Anne is something I will have to ponder to nail down for myself.

I am not "a guy in a dress" when I am in a dress or in any female clothing, it is because my gender has shifted to the feminine side what I want, how I feel, and what I am feeling interested in my emotions shift, not a lot but enough to know I am feeling differently and am a little different while still being fully aware that even so I am not a woman.
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Pam T.
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Re: Gender and sexuality

Post by Pam T. »

I feel extremely submissive when I am dressed up and I want a man to take control of me and tell me what to do.

When I am a guy I also want a man to take control of me so I guess you could call me gay then. I used to be in that dominate role with other guys but now all I want to be is taken control of and please the man that I am with. Perhaps I am Gender Fluid as well.
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