Conversation with a friend

General talk about CD/TGing and gender topics that aren't necessarily fun things we do while en femme, or for gender-driven discussions.

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Anne Bonny
Miss Diamond Goddess
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Conversation with a friend

Post by Anne Bonny »

Janis Joplin talks about rejection four days before she died in 1970 http://dangerousminds.net/comments/jani ... ed_in_1970" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

“In my insides, it really hurts if someone doesn’t like me. It’s silly.” Listen to Janis Joplin’s final interview—where she shows a more vulnerable side—with Howard Smith of The Village Voice on September 30, 1970. This was recorded just four days before Joplin died from a heroin overdose at the La…

Wow. Do you feel like that? I hope not. She let those who did not like her and how she was win...and get what she thought they wanted which was her gone. ...we forget what a different world it was for women coming out of the 60s. I also identify with that...coming out as TG or for Gays and lesbians same thing you face down those trying to keep you down..face down social norms. .society...the religious who see their self as holding the moral line AS THEY SEE IT and they believe their world would end if that line is breeched. So they are on that soapbox with that microphone in their hand and have their finger of oppression in the face of those they don't approve of...tough you are who you are..our book says people like you don't exist..and you don't according to our book here...you are just doing that...you are not really like that you are just choosing to do do that and can just stop. You can just go to our meetings and be what our book says is normal. Easy as flipping a light switch because people like you are just disgusting perverts and sinners...you are revolting against God's grand design...you are sinning...god made male and female and they are only attracted to each other and only fit in the roles god gave them. ...so..lot of haters out there if you challenge their concept of how things are. But they are not and those who don't fit are forced to hide...to suppress who they are inside to conform to a simplistic set of norms which state they do not exist. Joplin let them beat her and said fine...I'll eliminate myself then and do you a favor and clean it up for you I should not exist you say..I do so I'll take an overdose and take care of it for you...eliminate one of your problems out there...one down couple million to go. She was not willing to face society down, fight them and be an irritant working to force society to change it's arbitrary and unrealistic standards which are just flat out wrong. They've got it wrong through most of history. We are victims battered down...58 years for me to find my way clear of it. Then like Joplin we will still have to face down our accusers. Most people though do accept us but many not fully...I will have a very hard time finding a new woman. Even my wife only gave me partial acceptance...knew it was something I could not help...gave me some space but that was just tolerance for half of who I am as a whole. That hurt but she loved me in spite of it not ideal I accepted what I could get better than what anyone else would give far as I knew...now I will need someone who's fully accepting...understanding...attracted to all of who I am. I am not likely to find that but there are women out there.


You see there are religions made up by men all over the planet trying to explain what they never had the ability to understand...where did we come from..how...is there a reason or purpose for us? The cycle of life does not do it for them. They may very well be right in a sense there is an origin but If that was a thinking being...where the hell did it come from? No...some set of events just came together...there may or may not be a thinking presence...must there be? No. We will never know but all religions are made up by man. Hence there is no God laying down a will to follow...no such thing as sin therefore because there never was a being laing down rules to follow. Nope agnosticism...or cling to made up superstitions and ceremonies which are bogus. I choose to live by reason and confront reality logically as best I can using wits to survive and make the best of it. We can influence and minimize circumstances by anticipating by planning...preparing for and ride them out to optimize all outcomes or most in our favor by taking prudent actions. Responsible actions by thinking ahead and planning to weather whatever comes.

Ever see the Tempest (Shakespeare) with Helen Mirren? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eKrX3MzdFUI" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false; Hum...we are the master of our fate we are the captain of our soul...the poem...Invictus (William Earnest Henley 1875).

If you surrender your freedom to become a slave to anyone or to any thing you are nolonger free but a slave dependent on the master who owns you...a made up false god...drugs...society...your own self erected limits...I can't. ...who we are - we cannot change our being but we are able to think and to act in our own best interest rationally logically we act in our own best interests..to be our best self...treating others well...living our lives to achieve our goals and to deal with all life brings our way. Who needs a fantasy made up being? Not me...I am free.

The consequences of my actions are my own fortunately as are my achievements most all of it has been very good...wonderful...I will in the end have lived and had a good life.
Stop following the herd, the herd collectively I'd a dumb animal following consensus off a cliff. I'm telling you....don't be a lemming church because it has always been...social norms it's just the way things are...many of the greatest followed their own drummer...so beat to your own drum.
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Ralitsa
Miss Ruby Goddess
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Re: Conversation with a friend

Post by Ralitsa »

I agree with you Anne. Do you read Neitzche? Much of what you've written is basically his philosophy. Well it seems like the vast majority of people feel more comfortable if they sort of blend in to the rest of society and do nothing to stand out or be different. I guess that is fine for them, if that is what they like.
Maybe there is some sort of evolutionary benefit to following the herd and doing the same thing as everyone else. Luckily for us, we have, through our cleverness and hard work, managed to eliminate most of the natural risks that historically drove evolution in that direction. Or maybe that is all bunk too, and just some crazy non-sense I invented, who knows?
Anyway, when I look around at everyone, I see that I don't like many of them and I certainly don't want to be like them. And even the people whom I do like, I don't want to be like. So for me the whole concept of fitting in, doing what everyone else is doing, and being part of the group is incredibly distasteful. 100 years ago I would no doubt have been lynched, or shot, or burned at the stake, or put to some other death reserved for the most despicable infidels; and maybe in a previous life I was.
So when I see those sorts of people up on their soap box screaming that if I'm not like them, I will not go to heaven with them the first thing I think is: well if you're going there, then I'm pretty sure I don't want to. I find it pretty amusing that they actually believe that by hating, persecuting, and sometimes executing people, they can make those same people love them and want to be like them. It's pretty hilarious actually!
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Anne Bonny
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Re: Conversation with a friend

Post by Anne Bonny »

Wow I wrote that!? Hum I know of Neitzche Twilight of the Idols...God the spider...hum...I am an Agnostic, I reserve judgement on data that will never come. I am a realist, believe in Objectivism and the virtue of selfishness that man acts in his own best interest...Ayn Rand really mirrors my views very well. I will have to study Neitzche some more. Interesting.

We do not do ourselves any favors hiding. We need to come out and be micro activists...not be ashamed to tell people...for myself that I am genderfluid or transgender, but I like the former term and believe I will be using that it is a better descriptor of who I am.
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Noeleena
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Re: Conversation with a friend

Post by Noeleena »

Hi,

Oh WOW.....

Me thinks you live some where and I don't wont ever to go there .....How many people do you really know 10 100 maybe a 1000.... Now . how many really know you you have said a few things about others and what you think you see in their attitude towards you . have you asked them face to face what they really think. ...about you as a person or you the person .

I have a problem here,

you know I meet 1000s of people all walks of life, different attitudes , different backgrounds and different colours and I work with many people and help them with issues and problems they have and we talk about their life and whats affecting them so they can live in a way that is best for them and at least be safe ,

Yet I don't conform to this I have to be like every one else and be like them , i.m so bloody different it beggers belive that others would wont any thing to do with me let alone trust me ask my advice and help them . and quide them in matters that effect them so much ,

people trust me with so much , I just can not understand why in any way possible that you have so much issue with people ,

I left out one group of people you said about that seem to have major issue with those who are I,ll use not normal in their eye,s I don't wont to bring into our writing about the belive,s of others . or the perception of those people . remember I do have a large circle of friends and even from that group , any way leave that as it may .

Have you been to any other countrys and been involved with people , and talked with them ,
okay why I bring this up is today about 4 hours ago a guy was walking towards me and I knew he was not from Waimate were we live so I said Hi and we just nattered about things now this guy was quite normal and had a Bedford Bus ex school bus ,

and I asked where he was from Christchurch you know 2 1/2 hours away north of us you also know I have a passion for our Bands and music so yea got on to that and had a lovely natter , now he was wearing a dress of sorts in an orange colour and it made little difference to ether of us in how I approached him and our talk ,

Did he ? me as to what I am ...no..... did he see as male or female doubt he would have been interested because we talked as two normal people he would have accepted I was/ am a woman who is facial wise a little more masculine and that would be it , my manner and demeanor is just like other women , I may catch up with him again as he,ll be here house sitting for 2 weeks so there you go ,

If I had been judged as not normal he would not have bothered to talk to me as a complete stranger

I did not judge him based on what he wore and I don't really care he is a male and that's that ,,
and he did not judge me being a female or if I was different .
I know im different yet is this an issue I have when i have a conversion with others seems not,
so why do I have acceptance and fully . and you are seeming to having so much rejection .

Some times we need to look at our selfs first and see if we are the issue as to why we seem to not be accepted , I know also there are a few who wont accept those of difference yet some do change their thinking as they get to know us that I have proved many times .

Maybe what needs to be looked at is . us ,,,,,,,,how do we change ourselves in our attitudes how we go about seeing why we are not being accepted and see how we can work through those issues ,

I went to the people I talked ...WITH.... them , I told them about why I was different I appealed to them I humbled myself and did not make myself in any way better than them and I explained what they would see was real you know sometimes we really do need to step back and stop and put our selfs in their place to see if theres any thing we can do to allow others to see us as we are ,

...noeleena...
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Anne Bonny
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Location: The Gulf Coast

Re: Conversation with a friend

Post by Anne Bonny »

Hum...I like your thoughts here. I do not disagree at all. I do not think you know how oppressive those of faith in the states are especially in the deep south of our country. They believe they have the right to oppressively push their religious strictures and asceticism on society at large even imposing it on non adherents of their faith like it or not denying our right to be who we are. After all I have a very basic human right to be who I am, a very basic right to live with the same rights as everybody else. But In the United States those of faith seek to deny us even bare existence, let alone the right to be in public, to marry, to live, to look for a job, get it and to work and to go about our business - no we have to take every step into a court of law and to litigate nearly every step of the way. We are seen as people just doing who we are, what we are doing is a choice that can be stopped because we are just doing it, it is not real and we need to conform and because we do not we are not to be allowed to leave a deep dark closet and be in public in any way. Not free to be who we are, not free to live as I said. Here we have to fight fight fight. We have a complex because we were raised under oppression and had to suppress and hide so much so that even still at times I have difficulty freely being myself so as not to give offense and I should not have to worry about that at all but it is conditioned in me! I am overcoming all of this but it is very difficult, look how old I am - 58 - they nearly succeeded in forcing me to live my entire life denying my own rights to simply be who I am. So there is a lot of anger and it is simply a backlash. I am gradually ever expanding my circle of friends, I have discarded others - the entire church, anyone who will refuse to accept me. I am so glad that so many are out there who do not have a problem with me at all. While I am housebound during this very difficult phase of my life caring for my wife I do not come across many people but I am opening to those who will accept me, I have ladies I talk to on line too. It will get better. GG ladies..need to make that clarification especially here - ha!

noleena: "Me thinks you live some where and I don't wont ever to go there..." oh, ok I think I misunderstood not me but where I live - Right American Society is SO priggisly prudish stuck in christian moralism which is imposed of everybody - It is horrible - I hate having to gird myself up to just be who I am for crying out loud!!!

You can talk till you are blue in the face - their belief...that you will eventually become a bible thumping believer and life as they do because that is the ONLY truth there simply is no other possibility in their brain - that is it to them. Oh you are just saying these things...give it time you will be back to believing in god... That is why I simply separated from church they are never ever ever ever ever going to accept me, they will go to their death be buried and rotting in their graves in non acceptance of who we are...well fine! go rot!!!! They believe we are in a phase and will snap out of being who we are, that we were born this way and this IS who we are does not phase them - you simply have to write them off as a total loss. Like my mother in law last visit completely unwilling to accept I am an agnostic - "No you arn't..." They are not able to accept - hey! No, I am an agnostic...this is who I am and I will die this way. Let alone even thinking of raising my genderfluidity - no just forget it people like her are a complete and total write off!
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