What's Caitlyn done for you?

General talk about CD/TGing and gender topics that aren't necessarily fun things we do while en femme, or for gender-driven discussions.

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What has Caitlyn done for you personally? Not "the cause," but for you.

Gave me hope
0
No votes
Helped me come out
2
7%
Inspired me to go forward
2
7%
Made it worse for me (explain)
2
7%
Nothing
14
47%
Nothing now but we will see later
7
23%
Other
3
10%
 
Total votes: 30
Martina Hall
Miss Golden Goddess
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Re: What's Caitlyn done for you?

Post by Martina Hall »

After Wednesday's ESPY speech, Caitlyn has inspired me to think of 2015 as Tranny Summer. Really itching to put on those heels and hit the mall.
She really had some serious points for people to think about, as well.
I AM my own hot girlfriend.
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Rikki
Miss Golden Goddess
Posts: 801
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Location: Northeast USA

Re: What's Caitlyn done for you?

Post by Rikki »

She has brought me so close to the "edge of disclosure" lately with wifey. But being the coward that I am, not wanting to have to fix what ain't broke, I have shied away from taking that leap. I read wife's feelings about Caitlyn: she supports and applauds Jenner for her courage, feels like me that others will benefit by her coming out, that lives will be saved. But at the same time, wifey alludes that she feels sad for Jenner's kids and the ex-wives. That's when I step back from the edge, not wanting my lovely lady to put herself in Chris Jenner's shoes. I love her too much.

Rikki
Be safe, Be frilled
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DonnaT
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Joined: Fri Sep 17, 2004 11:04 am
Location: No. Virginia

Re: What's Caitlyn done for you?

Post by DonnaT »

Nice article in the Wall Street Journal http://www.wsj.com/articles/caitlyn-jen ... 1437336364" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Just, don't read the bigoted comments.
DonnaT
Alexia
Miss Sapphire Goddess
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Joined: Sat Jul 25, 2015 4:29 am

Re: What's Caitlyn done for you?

Post by Alexia »

Rikki, I just read your post after I voted and it is heartbreaking.

If what your wife wrote really means that she would be upset if you told her, then that must be difficult for you.
I'm single, so no issues here, fortunately.
For one of those few moments in my life, I'm happy to be single.
I would always want to be honest with my SO, if I had one.
But I also think that sometimes, what you don't know, won't hurt you, at least for myself.
I once told a friend, on the subject of cheating, that I would hate to be cheated on and would probably end any relationship if I found out my SO was cheating.
Even if that cheating was one time and the biggest mistake in my SO's life, something they immediately regretted and immediately knew they would never do again.
It would mean I would end a perfectly good relationship, would have to, because I would never be able to recover from that.
So under those circumstances, I'd rather not know and be blissfully unaware.
This may be another one of those things that you are better off not knowing.

If it ever comes out, you can point her to this thread and tell her, you didn't want to lie to her, you wanted to tell her, you wanted to be honest, but were afraid it would do no good, on the contrary.

Also, I don't think you're a coward.
It is logical to keep crossdressing a secret, considering how little it is accepted.
Why put yourself through pain, if it serves no good purpose whatsoever?
Never mind when it would hurt both of you.

Maybe she just means that she thinks many other women would be upset?
Maybe she herself would be at least somewhat okay with it, especially if you talk things out?
Maybe she suspects something and uses this as an opportunity to broach the subject, without addressing it directly?
If she suspects anything, then maybe she will ask someday and then it probably will be time to be honest and let the chips fall where they may.
If she does suspect something, but doesn't want to know, she just won't ask.

Why take the risk of telling her?
Just to clear your own conscience, or because you're having trouble dealing with denying a part of you?
If you do want to tell her, maybe you can use this topic to test the waters?
But I'd be very careful, as I for one am very afraid of outing myself to anyone.
Even asking her the question if she would rather be told the truth even if it meant she might be hurt, or rather not know, or something like that, could set of all kinds of alarm bells.
She might think you were about to tell her you are cheating on her.
I don't envy that position, no matter how much I'd want to be in a relationship.
Only you can make this choice and it is a difficult one.

For what it is worth, in this case, I think you're making the right call by not telling her.
It is not cowardly, or selfish, you're protecting both her and yourself, and your family if the two of you have kids.
At the same time, it may hurt you too, as it means hiding a significant part of yourself from your SO, pretending to her that it doesn't exist at all.
So this is not an easy way out, a cowardly solution, at all.

Maybe some of the SOs can weigh in on this, that'd be a very interesting point of view in this case.

Good luck!
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Victoria P.
Miss Crystal Goddess
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Location: S.E.On, Canada

Re: What's Caitlyn done for you?

Post by Victoria P. »

I have nothing against Caitlyn though I truly believe she waited far too long and in turn hurt her wife deeply,at least thats what my usually supportive gf of 5 years says.

If I were in the same situation I would have come out earlier before children were on the scene,just my opinion.

When I met my current gf Cathy I came out to her within 3 months but very so gradually and after a week or two of concerns she was fabulous about ti and we go shopping at times.

Hugs Victoria P xxx
Pam T.
Miss Silver Goddess
Posts: 49
Joined: Sun Sep 20, 2015 8:36 pm

Re: What's Caitlyn done for you?

Post by Pam T. »

I don't think she has really done anything for me. I am not rich and I don't have the money that she has to make such drastic changes so fast. It seems like everything that she has done has happen so fast in her life. I mean once she was a guy and then the next thing you know she is a female and I don't have such luck or the money to transition like that.

I wish that I could transition like that but I cannot. Perhaps someday I will.
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