crossdessing ups and down

General talk about CD/TGing and gender topics that aren't necessarily fun things we do while en femme, or for gender-driven discussions.

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Kelly Marie Ross
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crossdessing ups and down

Post by Kelly Marie Ross »

I love dressing up I like the way I feel but then at times I think what is wrong with me. I like wearing mini skirts panties bras. Then I go back what am I doing. Any other girls feel that way?
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Carol Ann
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Re: crossdessing ups and down

Post by Carol Ann »

No not I, As when I dress I am comfortable with myself @@9@@
Anthony Simon
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Re: crossdessing ups and down

Post by Anthony Simon »

I used to have that very bad. There are still conflicts, but they tend not to come out after I've CDed. They seem to have more to do with me going any further with it.
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Michelle Diane
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Re: crossdessing ups and down

Post by Michelle Diane »

I have to agree with Carol Ann on this in the fact that I'm only comfortable when I'm fully dressed. Now I do find my desires to dress comes in waves and there have been times when I don't feel the desire to dress but I've never said to myself "what's wrong with me". Besides skirts are so much more comfortable than pants any day so for me a chance to swap the two is never missed. :)
One wears a mask for so long you forget who you are beneath it......I've now removed my mask.
Mikaela
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Re: crossdessing ups and down

Post by Mikaela »

Don't worry Kelly. I feel it all the time too. Its certainly in waves for me. Part of the "guilt" you feel is because you might have a bit of a perception that was you are feeling is "wrong." As you accept more and more of who you are, that will go away!
~~You can't ignore who you are forever. Once you start on this path, you continue to walk forward, even if you stop for a while.~~
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Erica S
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Re: crossdessing ups and down

Post by Erica S »

Kelly, I too feel that way when I dress. When I am dressing and being Erica I feel great and have a wave of femininity come over me. I desire to dress this way all the time and realize I can not at the present time. After dressing I have the emotions of why do I do this? What would my family think of me. The questions are endless. I also ask why can't I be this way all the time as I feel comfortable in women's clothing and love to wear it.

I know I do not have an answer to your quandary, yet I would not stop if you feel good about dressing. I know I do not want to stop it is part of me now and I love it.

Hugs,

Erica
If the woman inside of you needs to be free, let it happen, and you can soar.
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Diana Michelle
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Re: crossdessing ups and down

Post by Diana Michelle »

As one who has done some counseling to the local TG community your feelings are not uncommon. The guilt factor is generally the cause, after all stereotypes tell us men don't wear dresses. As the TG community is so small, its difficult to tell how really big it is as so many in the closet afraid to even admit to themselves let alone others their feelings.
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Melissa Mac
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Re: crossdessing ups and down

Post by Melissa Mac »

Like probably all of you I had those same feelings Kelly. I have long come to accept two people live inside me and both need to come out. I have periods when I may dress maybe one day in 3 weeks then there are times I feel the need to dress everyday. Just go with the flow Kelly and enjoy your life!
Trudy
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Re: crossdessing ups and down

Post by Trudy »

Back and. I was in my teens I had the guilt feelings as well. It wasn't until I came out to my Aunt that I started the acceptance of the girl in me. Back in those early days after I came to grips with myself I was satisfied to dress once or twice a week. As time went on I found the desire grew. On my 35th birthday I came out to people at work and started coming to work dressed in skirted suits. Then again I owned the company so they really didn't have a lot to say about it. :) The acceptance of the girl inside coupled with getting comfortable with her will alleviate the guilt and anxiety. How much you dress and whether you go out in the world or stay behind closed doors is a personal choice. There is no right or wrong, just what you are comfortable with. Me? Well I haven't worn male clothes in probably 2 years now. Yes I still have them but they have been relegated to the closet in the bedroom I have converted into an office.
Kelly
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Re: crossdessing ups and down

Post by Kelly »

Hi Kelly Marie,

If everybody did it, would you feel guilty? Of course not. If everybody did it would you question what your are doing? Again, of course not.

Now everybody doesn't do it. How many do? Nobody knows. It is not considered to be common behavior [notice I didn't say 'normal' - that 'normal' word sends us all down a rat hole]. Just because it is not common, does that make it wrong or unjustified. Of course not.

But doing things outside of normal can make us jumpy. After all would an observer say/think/react? We worry about that. We put those feeling into emotional bucket that have labels such as guilt, humiliation, shame, fear.

Yes I have dumped my feeling in each of those buckets at one time or another. I don't anymore, they are just fleeting feelings and I brush them aside and enjoy myself instead.

Kelly.
I thought a CD was something you stuck in a computer
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Lily
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Re: crossdessing ups and down

Post by Lily »

Yes Kelly, My guy side and my Fem side don't fight over who is going to come out but I start feeling the need to dress. It gets stronger and stronger and once I let it out for a few days I feel fine again. But at times I start feeling like I'm doing something wrong. Then I go back to being my guy self until I feel the need again.
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April Rose
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Re: crossdessing ups and down

Post by April Rose »

It's been over ten years now since I made a decision that finally got me out of that awful cycle of feeling driven to dress, and feeling very frustrated when I couldn't, and then the guilt or sometimes depression afterward. I was over fifty at the time and had come to realize crossdressing wasn't going away.

I resolved to myself that I would dress for at least 15 minutes every day whether I felt like it or not. Of course, there were a few days when circumstances absolutely would not allow that. But for the most part I was able to stick with it. It helped that my wife has known since before we were married.

Gradually, over time, it changed everything. Crossdressing went from being a highly charged situation, to being a habit. Mind you, I'm not crossdressing any less. Probably more. The difference is, that driven quality and the resulting guilt has completely gone away.

I no longer dress just to dress. I dress to cook, or to clean house, or to sew, or play my guitar or read a book or whatever. I realize I'm a rather feminine guy, so this may not work for everyone, but it works for me. Crossdressing is still a cherished part of my life, but it is no longer in the drivers seat.
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Cindi Coral
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Re: crossdessing ups and down

Post by Cindi Coral »

I get the same feelings, a needing to dress up fully, I love the feel off it all, the freedom and the movement of a skirt or dress, I can be in dress for hours, when opportunity is there I sleep in a satin night dress and dress as if a normal day. but then comes the guilt, I think its because boys were boys when we grew up, the thing I hate is women can wear anything male or female and its ok, but a bloke in a dress !! I love satin and lace , have for most of my life, but I also love women.... ..|/-
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Rikki
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Re: crossdessing ups and down

Post by Rikki »

I feel your pain and sentiments, Cindi. Big time.

Rikki
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Martina Hall
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Re: crossdessing ups and down

Post by Martina Hall »

Kelly, I do not feel guilty at all. Guilt is for people who are doing something wrong.
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