Thoughts on Caitlyn Jenner's autobiograpy

[Anne Bonny]

I am disenchanted with Caitlyn Jenner because on page 197 of her book she looks askance at those who are genderfluid! Rather hypocritical considering her earlier struggles with her gender...never predicting she would eventually transition at age 65. She states she has breast forms in her closet...Yet she states in a round about way that those who are genderfluid hurt the cause because men in dresses, or wearing make up or nail polish make people nervous. I went to her site and responded but never got an answer. I just stated our community is very diverse and we are all different and it is our community as a whole who we should be working to advance even in my mind men who would wear dresses period. Or gender fluid men who may wear lipstick and or nail polish and ear rings and dress male when they go to work. Society be damned. It is not superficial appearance but the fact that we are just like everybody else in society we only differ in our appearance. I was no where near that edgy I basically reminded her we are diverse and are all unique and that transition is not for everybody. That considering her earlier struggles does she truly mean to say only those who present well and pass are to be out in society because the rest of us hurt the cause for them!? Rather outrageous. Thing is Caitlyn is a sports star and a personality not a rocket scientist so she tends to be superficial, simplistic and has not thought enough about her positions, she needs to think her position through thoroughly instead of shooting on the fly...Oh well. So Caitlyn Jenner is problematic, and unfortunately... kind of a hair brained lightweight who should think before she expresses her ideas if she is going to put herself out there as a leader for the LGBTQ community. Yeah...I celebrate much of her book but I was sadly disappointed with parts of it ... understandably. Like during electrolysis when she is working to have the some 30,000 facial hairs zapped, describes the discomfort and at times moderate pain of having each follicle oblated and puts out there that it is some kind of penance for being a bad father who was not there! What...rubbish! Does he really believe his own neurotic self pity!?


I still have about 100 pages left to read...but it will be with lessening enthusiasm, but not without some identification about an experience through life which we seem to have shared, and still amazed at the many similarities in our early life, our personalities, and our school experience and struggles with our gender through life. There are many ways in which we differ too, but it is an interesting read.

[Amanda R]

I have finished read Caitlyn's autobiography and to be totally honest it was pretty much what I had expected. Yes it had some good points however it was more of a "Hey look at me and how wonderful I am for doing this." As for Caitlyn's statement about being unimpressed about gender fluid individuals I would not place a lot of stock in it Anne. You yourself state that she is relatively superficial and not a deep thinker. She is a spoiled, selfish individual who had her moment of stardom back in the 1976 Olympics and has since spent a lifetime trying to reclaim that fame and glory of the spotlight. Why else would if she was so gender confused throughout her life marry someone like Kris Kardashian? Please don't give me any rubbish about trying to run from his/her true inner feelings!

Her recounting of the agony of electrolysis, her excuses for being a bad father, as well as her other whining are simply a statement of "feel sorry for poor Caitlyn." She talks of her struggles as though she is the only one in the world that has gone through them. What of the 1000's of girls out there without the resources she possesses or support to even take a first step down the path to transition? Who feels sorry for them? IMO certainly not Caitlyn Jenner! If she did she would have donated all the proceeds from her autobiography to a worthy LGBTQ resource to help her sisters out there less fortunate than her,

As for her being a spokeswoman or a role model for the TG community, IMO she is so far from that the thought of it being even partially true is laughable. As I have said above she only gives lip service to being that for as far as I know she has not made a single contribution to the community, financial or otherwise! She had her opportunity when she went public but instead she took her 15 minutes of further fame then disappeared. The spokeswomen and role models for the community are those who have gone before us. Those that have given back to the community in their words, deeds, and actions, financial or otherwise. I know several and these pioneers are the ones I look up to. I know one quite well and she was there for me and my family in the beginning helping us to understand everything and accept. She opened herself to us telling us of her story, the mistakes she made along the way, and showing us the options available to me. She never asked anything in return from any of us. She did suggest whatever path I took I give back to those who follow which I fully intend to do.

That is the type of spokeswoman and role model the entire community needs regardless of where they fit in! Not some self centered used to be attempting to profit from her being TG and find another 15 minutes in the spotlight!

[Anne Bonny]

Ok...I mean I see her much differently on reading her book. She like all of us have struggled with this over our lives I will not take that part away from her and that is why I picked the book up mainly because I wanted to see how her struggle with it compares with mine...I am not a reader so I have to have a very compelling interest to read a book or it winds up sitting unread covered with dust and I can say I have enjoyed reading it.

I will not criticize her over her obvious failings, and acknowledge her failings as a representative she is a sports star...yeah she has made some whoppers... but I will acknowledge that any who publicly raise attention and bring some better understanding to the public arena for our cause has helped us. Takes a lot to just put yourself out there and to be crucified for it. She has made mistakes, she is human and imperfect and I will not beat her up because she is focused on her problems ... aren't we all!?

There are better leaders out there sure. Is she obligated to give every cent she has earned on her biography to others? No I disagree...should she work more to help others...yes...she has stated in several places that she has tried to help others in the community. Should she give money? That is up to her but It is a good thing to do. People have a right to enjoy the fruit of their labor. If her pockets are deep enough...who knows what her income is now? Her one claim to fame was the Decathlon in 1976...who knows what her finances are...many famous people die without a cent to their name. But if she has the ability to help others in a more substantial way then sure if she can afford it and is inclined to as she seems to state then yeah, she should.

I am not going to condemn Caitlyn... Are there better leaders yes, I suppose...I am not really an activist so I am not qualified to say. I remember Renee Richards coming out in the 70's, saw the made for TV movie....have heard about Kathleen Jorgensen back post WWII and in the 50's. Off the top of my head at this moment. I am just an average person who has lived with this my entire life and have struggled with it and who finally in relatively recent years has come to a much better understanding of myself. I am happy of course to help any who might come to me with all that I know as I am sure all of us are.

Anne.

[Heather W]

I just finished Caitlyn Jenner's autobiography and to be honest I was left somewhat indifferent by the whole thing. Yes she went through the agony of hiding as well as the physical and emotional trials and tribulations not only prior to but as well as through transition. I can feel for her having been there however her story is not that different than many others. The difference is she had her moment in the sun and lingered as a wannabe celebrity for years. IMO that doesn't really make her any different than a lot of the rest of us.

I am not sure she needs to donate all the proceeds from her book as Amanda suggests however as for being a spokesperson and role model for the TG community, I think not! Yes she came out early and I had hopes for her however after a few photo ops she disappeared only to suddenly reappear as the new woman. Oh and by the way to hawk her book! Where was she between her moment in the spotlight when she received an award for her "courage" and the time she started her book tour? Yes she had her GCS during that time but so did others. She talks of her helping others but other than enriching her agent and her own pocketbook there is little evidence of that. I am not saying she isn't helping but there are others out there who are actively helping many and standing up for us by their words and actions.

[Anne Bonny]

Yeah...I can see that...and I agree.... She was famous in the late 70's, her fame has decreased since then went up some with the Kardashians, her GCS etc... with this autobiography perhaps a last gasp? Cashing in...yeah probably.... If she is really interested then she should probably organize and seek to advocate in some way for the community.... Agree I do not really see any real effort other than an occasional appearance here and there with little impact if any.

Who do you see as our leaders and are there any more interesting reads for us?

[Rikki]

To me, I was happy that Caitlin hasn't been splattered all over the media since her "big reveal". Leading a relatively quiet, private life as the person she is shows me that her transition was an honest, heartfelt move on her part. Not another chapter in the reality show sagas that make me cringe because of their shallowness.

I salute all of you who are/have made the transition, you are amazing and brave souls. Bravo!

Rikki

[Heather W]

Who do you see as our leaders

Who do we see as our "leaders"? I think that may vary from individual to individual and their circumstances. Personally I see the leaders as those who speak up for us, who host group meetings, who work with girls contemplating transition and/or GCS, who tirelessly work both in front and behind the scenes without the desire for fame and fortune, and so on. These are the leaders we should all look up to. These people do not ask anything in return other than give back when you are ready.

I was blessed to have such an individual in my life as I contemplated and then began my transition. She was there from the start and through my GCS and today I am proud to call her a friend. Very early on I asked her something to effect of "What's in this for you?" Her response was just the satisfaction of helping someone through the morass of all of this so my journey was better than hers. The only thing she asked in return was when the time and place was right to give back. When she first said that to me I wasn't really sure what she meant but now I understand. To me she and others like her are the leaders!

[Amanda R]

Who do you see as our leaders and are there any more interesting reads for us?

Perhaps if we are looking for leaders we need to look to those who are out there and attempting to make the world a better place not for just the TG community but all.

http://www.nbcnews.com/feature/nbc-out/ ... te-n768831

As for interesting reads Anne, they are out there everyday on the web. I have my personal favorites and I am sure with little effort you can find yours.

[Anne Bonny]

Sure! You're right. Yeah...I do. But I suppose I am not motivated to actively search they just bubble up from time to time in the news.

Yeah...there is absolutely no reason at all not to run for congress, or for other government offices...there have been quite a few mayors and city counsel members....why not the next level - We are people too!!! Absolutely! I agree and good luck to her.

[Diana Michelle]

I have read Caitlyn Jenner's autobiography and to be honest it was similar to many celebrity "tell all" books, lot of fluff with some substance scattered throughout. I agree there were moments I said to myself yes I know that feeling having lived through it myself however there were more give me a freaking break moments. The electrolysis section several have referred to was laughable. It was like what did you expect? It was going to be a pleasurable experience and they were going to serve you champagne and caviar?

I am not going to make light of her struggles and inner turmoil having been there as have several of the posters here. It is a time of discovery and joy while also simultaneously period of rejection, loneliness, and self doubt. It grows easier with time and today there are resources available to the TG community that didn't even exist 5 years ago.

Her decision to come out as she did I believed showed courage at the time although my opinions have changed over time. The Vogue cover, the ESPN Courage award, her making the rounds of the talk show circuit offered hope we would have a highly visible spokeswoman for the rest of those struggling, many in silence, with gender dysphoria. I can even understand why she went stealth seeking a "normal" life. I tried as much as possible to do the same during my own transition as well as after GCS.

What tainted my opinion was how she mystically reappeared announcing her GCS only to be followed up quickly the announcement "I have written a book" and the requisite book tour and parade of the book selling appearances on the morning shows. I went to her website, http://caitlynjenner.com/ , and the first thing I was greeted with was a pop up to order her book. With every attempt to leaf through yet more of that pop up. Her Foundation talks a good game about "Empowering the Transgender Community" and how she wants to help yet there is not a single reference of any such assistance. I am reminded of OJ and how after he was found innocent he was going to search for the "real" killer. Guess he couldn't find the killer on the golf courses or at the sports memorabilia shows across the country.

The bottom line is while it is not IMO a "must" read for the TG community it offers some decent information. I would tell anyone reading to take it with a grain of salt and understand that any celebrity that writes a book does so for the money! I have no idea what her advance for the book was but I would expect it to be substantial. The almighty dollar speaks loudly!

I salute all of you who are/have made the transition, you are amazing and brave souls. Bravo!

Rikki

Yes Rikki it takes courage to take that leap of blind faith when one transitions however that is not the driving force for anyone who takes that step. It is about being the person we are, having the façade match the inside. Whenever I talk with anyone considering or going through transition I tell them it tales courage and determination because of the discrimination, slings and arrows of some, the potential rejection of friends and family, and loneliness. It is about having that certain "gumption" to face all of these and more. That is where the courage comes from.