How do you feel about being a man?

How are you dealing with or handling this aspect of your life?

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Lacey Hadley
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Re: How do you feel about being a man?

Post by Lacey Hadley »

Much like others here I am generally fine with my duality. Yes, I have struggled with this at times in my life but I'm ok with it mostly. As my guy self I'm much like any other guy. I think and act much like any of my male peers and buddies. I have many the same male interests and as such am good with being a 'dude'. I will say this, that my femme side always is there with me, below my male surface. When I see attractive women in real life and on t.v. or in movies, my male side has the same sort of male attractions. But along with those comes my femme side as Lacey and usually I see the clothes, shoes/boots, hair and makeup and see if and how much I may like it and would like to imagine what I may look like wearing such when dressed enfemme as Lacey. I guess much like most GG's would when they see another woman's clothes, shoes/boots, hair and makeup as they often are critical positive or negative and/or imagine buying the same or similar type clothes, shoes/boots for their wardrobe and or maybe see doing hair and make up similarly.

Back to my dude side if I find a women I see in real life and/or on t.v. or movies attractive to me and I like her outfit including maybe her shoes/boots my mind may think first as a dude, "Hmm I'd do her" [-X ,but then my femme mind thinks, I would want to put on her clothes. \:D/

Crossdressing has been both a struggle and a joy for me my whole life. I have tried to balance both sides of me as best I can and I am ok with being a guy, but I love when I slip into feminine mode and especially when I do myself up as Lacey with clothes, shoes/boots, hair and makeup. Dressed as her, I go to a softer, gentler, more of a peaceful part of my persona. I'm a type of person who does not really know how to truly relax in my daily life. Only when I'm dressed as Lacey can I get to a more relaxing way of feeling. @@9@@
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OliviaM
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Re: How do you feel about being a man?

Post by OliviaM »

Hi Lacey! Wow, we are in the same boat. I have a lot of the same feelings. While I did have cross dressing feelings through my life, I couldn't it was a struggle. Only in the last two years have I struggled to express the duality of my person. And it always feels good to know there is someone who feels and thinks a lot of the same things I do. That's why I love this place. Thanks Lacey!!

(--) (--) (--) Olivia
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Lacey Hadley
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Re: How do you feel about being a man?

Post by Lacey Hadley »

Thank you Olivia, :yes: :wink: lots of similar minded and lived history crossdressers here. It makes me feel like I'm not so alone and not so an outsider in life. As a crossdresser in male mode I live both sides, but I love my feminine side as Lacey very much. It's been many ups and downs through my life but I finding a movement to more peace and less confusion as time passes. I may never be as out and about as other cders here I am trying to gain such strength as when I see Lacey dressed and feeling good, but I feel that almost nobody knows her and that makes me a bit sad. :crying: But regardless I try hard to live my life more at peace, cding and Lacey helps me much :teddybear:.



*** Post edited to remove redundant quote, as per: http://crossdressers-haven.com/forums/v ... 65&t=10059" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false; - SL
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Emily
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Re: How do you feel about being a man?

Post by Emily »

Martha G wrote:But unfortunately the desire to dress never goes away. It may slow down at times but....
I agree Martha, the desire never really goes away - but for me it does slow down at times, mostly due to circumstance (work, friends, family, etc...).

In an earlier post I mentioned that I don't mind my guy time, but after a prolonged period of being in guy mode, I find myself longing to be femme, wishing that I can just be Lexi. At least for a little while.

I'd say that I get maybe about 5-10% femme time each week. If I were able to change that to set my own personal preference, I'd probably mix it up somewhere around 50-50. An equal mix! :lol:

Love, love, love my femme time, but I am ok being a guy too - hanging out with my buds, having a few brews, doing the "guy" thing! I guess what it really come down to is balance. Its all about balance...
Kitty
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Re: How do you feel about being a man?

Post by Kitty »

Martha G wrote:Glad to see someone thinks like I do.

But unfortunately the desire to dress never goes away. It may slow down at times but....
Never goes away entirely for me. It's always 25% there.

But when it's full on, it's 1,000%
You get one life, live it the way you want - as long as you don't harm others
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Ms. Erin
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Re: How do you feel about being a man?

Post by Ms. Erin »

I can not even think about ever going back in male mode. I am now almost two years full time and since 11 January 2016 legally female. Yes I still have some male parts down there but its all 90% dead anyway. Saving for SRS, aiming 3 years from now.

But next to that little dead physical part, the only place I still feel not 100% female is at work.

My job at the railroad is a masculine job, most co-workers think a woman don't belong here. And me being a "trader", going from M to F, surely not. However I am out, with female employee ID badge and dress/behave female, but in a moderate gender neutral kind of way. I know most accept me but some don't like the idea, so I try not to rub it in to much.

When I am off work I don't even think about being male at all. I guess the hormones makes things easier on me as well, compared to when I first started out. I am much more confident and comfortable being me.

I don't hardly use any makeup and I know I don't pass as 100% female, especially when I start to talk (speech therapy needed) but for 95% of the time people, both male and female, call me by the correct pronoun and treat me as a lady/woman.

So... nope to answer this post... I only thought about like being a man while I was answering this post. :)
I am a woman of trans experience.
Victoria K.
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Re: How do you feel about being a man?

Post by Victoria K. »

I deal with it! but most of the time i wish i could wake up as a woman! hoping being a man was just a long dream lol
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Ms Jane
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Re: How do you feel about being a man?

Post by Ms Jane »

I am happy being a man I love my work and am happy with my lot. If I weren't a man I could not crossdress. That would hurt as I love skirts and dresses.
Victoria K.
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Re: How do you feel about being a man?

Post by Victoria K. »

No so great!! Always loved the females way of life but was afraid to live it.Making up for lost time now.
Spreading the love that the world desperately needs and being true to yourself. ❤
Wesley
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Re: How do you feel about being a man?

Post by Wesley »

How do I FEEL?

Good question. Tough question for many of us. Having XY Chromosomes was just a small part of the thousands of genetic variations that I could have received in the genetic lottery.

I am, what I am. Now what is AM? (Not amplitude modulation, or ante meridiem) my state of mind, of being, of body, of my environment that I choose. . .

Most of my daily interaction, for work, pleasure or other occurs as a man. I suspect many of my fellow voyagers on this journey overlook some of the advantages. For instance, being an RN, I never worry about calling a doctor in the middle of the night for some overlooked ministerial order for a patient. Being assertive, makes for much better interactions. I don't have to worry about monthly cycles of repetitive shedding of a uterine wall. I don't have wide emotional variability due to those cycles. Being the person the other female RN's come to for help opening bottles is nice, but always being called to help move large patients is a proverbial "female dog". Yeah, I'm a real He-man, with a gut that looks like it belongs on a duluth trading company commercial for underwear. . (sorry, couldn't resist the chance to implant a little mental imagery.)

I HAVE, unlike most of the men around, (maybe 2% to 7% cross dressers?) Can choose to assert my feminine side, dress as a woman, assert my assumed identity and revel in something that would terrify most men.

I CAN wear a bra and forms, panties, womens shoes every day and no one notices. No one cares. I feel better when I do that. It is my little secret! While talking with someone, the thought dances in my mind that, "I have boobs, I am secretly dressed RIGHT HERE IN PUBLIC! So there general public!

I CAN freely choose between the two. I am not trapped in either sphere, but can move to some degree between them. Most cannot, and would not. . I think Martha G put it well:
Martha G wrote:I like being a man.

I am basically a man who loves to dress and act like a woman at times.

I feel so relaxed in feminine attire and makeup. I enjoy showing off my feminine side . I have developed some feminine mannerisms as well.
. . .
But when the dress and makeup is off. I am back to being my male self.

However I have to say I thoroughly enjoy dressing and acting like a woman.
In general terms, that is it. I can choose. I am aware that going to a doctor and getting put on Testosterone suppressing meds, and low dose of estrogen variants would make my body more feminine . .

BUT SEX DRIVE. . .diminishes. It's based on Testosterone, in both men and women. I enjoy, (forgive me here) being able to ejeculate and have normal orgasms.

I am happy with twigs and berries that function as they should!

I am contented as a man, who can act like a woman when I wish.
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Stephanie M
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Re: How do you feel about being a man?

Post by Stephanie M »

It has pros and cons just like everything else in life.

Pros you don't really have to worry about your looks, you can be overweight, don't have to fuss with your hair put on makeup or really do anything to go out in public, and the biological things we guys don't have to deal with.

Cons you're expected by society to always act "manly" and if you don't people think you're weird or something. If your choice of clothing isn't gender specific then people look down at you vs being a woman who can literally dress from head to toe in men's clothing and no one generally thinks anything of it.

A woman can be in a "manly" profession like law enforcement military, or fire fighter and be seen as just one of the guys by male peers, but also has the option of going home and slipping into something really girly and relaxing at the end of the day. Which is how I am. My job isn't anything thought of as "manly" but all day I present myself as a man then at the end of the day I slip into something girly and relax. Basically women have the option of being not constrained by gender and no one thinks anything of it, but god forbid a guy goes off the reservation and slips into something feminine if he does there must be something wrong with him, he's a pervert, or all kinds of bad things are thought and said. It's the double standard that really makes me not like being a man. Then again if I was a woman I would miss out of the joy of being "naughty" by wearing women's clothing. It's like they say the grass is always greener.
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Estefania
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Re: How do you feel about being a man?

Post by Estefania »

I feel... fine being a man. I enjoy being a good husband and father, son and brother. I don't do "manly" things that make me feel bad. People who know me knows that I don't pretend to enjoy going to home improvement stores or browsing at the tool/garden section at Sears. My daughter knows that for a shopping trip, she can count on me (my wife too, but my wife is not really into shopping. That is just not her thing). I went shopping for my daughter's prom dress with her, for example. :)

I guess that what I want to say is that I can do whatever I want as a man without needing to dress up as a woman. (Other than those activities that would require me to be enfemme). Not sure if it makes sense. But really, I'm equally as loving and caring and as silly and as hard-headed and stubborn regardless of what I may be wearing.

I don't dislike and even less hate being me, because it is the same "me" all the time, in dockers than in Gloria Vanderbilt jeans. :)

Gaby
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Stephanie M
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Re: How do you feel about being a man?

Post by Stephanie M »

I actually like going to home depot I'm not all that handy really but I love browsing. :mrgreen:
Well, we all have a face
That we hide away forever
And we take them out
And show ourselves when everyone has gone
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