HELP!!! A guy is trying to pick me up.

How are you dealing with or handling this aspect of your life?

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Michelle Diane
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HELP!!! A guy is trying to pick me up.

Post by Michelle Diane »

Hello ladies,

It seems I have an apology to make to you. I disappeared from every forum I was a member off after my wife passed away….I simply lost interest. Now out of the blue I show up here asking for advice. SORRY. There's literally no one else I can turn to as the only “family” left is my wife's step sister. A good woman but very staunch in her Christian views and I know would be of no help at all.

I'm staying in a hotel rather than renting an apartment because after crunching some numbers...It's cheaper!! Also I can up and leave with no notice if I want to with no lease penalty etc.

I now live 24/7 as a woman I've grown my hair out I pierced my ears and failed miserably to grow my nails out but still their painted. Most days I'm wearing some makeup usually do my brows pop on some eyeliner, mascara and a nice nude matte lipstain, my current favourite. I also treated myself to a simple Topaz engagement ring that matches my 2mm white gold wedding ring.

Okay now you're up to speed. About 2 weeks ago around 2am I stepped out for a cigarette I was wearing jeans, a blue V neck lattice front top which can show some cleavage if I pull it down. I bought some new shoes, 3” heels, and was wearing them to break them in. The door opens and a guy steps out and says hi them immediately asks if my husband was in bed? I replied no my wife passed away it's just me. Then he makes casual small talk but starts leaning to making veiled comments that two people shouldn't be alone at this time of night and he's having trouble getting to sleep and his 'hand' isn't doing it any more for him. Then casually mentions it's been ages since he had a good 'mouth hug'. I laugh it off and step inside...damn he follows me. As I turn down my hallway he's still there his room is down the same hall...crap!! As I stop at my door he says good night and leans in to give me a kiss. I back up and tell him to go to bed as he's got to work later he replies that if I get lonely his room has a king bed. I get inside and double lock my door.

Thinking it was a one off I brushed it off. Later that week we met again and chatting I mentioned I had a stiff neck well nothing happened until I was at my door along with my shadow as I turned to put the key in I felt his hands on my shoulders and he gives me a neck rub he leans closer and says that this would be easier if I was laying on his bed and my top was off, I didn't have to remove my bra unless I wanted to. I literally froze I mean couldn't move. I came to and shrugged out of the neck rub and turned to say that he's a nice guy but not my type.

We've met since then and he's still trying it on, trying to impress me with his Lexus SUV and his boat moored in the Florida keys. The lecherous a-hole won't give up. Any suggestions are gratefully received.

Thank you. :)
One wears a mask for so long you forget who you are beneath it......I've now removed my mask.
Anthony Simon
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Re: HELP!!! A guy is trying to pick me up.

Post by Anthony Simon »

Welcome back, Michelle Diane.

I remember a programme where this GG was trying to teach CDs how to behave like women - and one example came up where a guy wouldn't give up (it was role play, but still). The CD reverted to male character and got in the face of the guy who was coming onto her. The GG said "No, this was the wrong way to do it" and said the way of "getting rid" of the guy was to leave the guy standing there and walk away.

You can always move - or rent. He won't be able to chase you then.
Socrates: The highest wisdom is to know that you know nothing.

Bill and Ted: That's us, dude.
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Diana Michelle
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Re: HELP!!! A guy is trying to pick me up.

Post by Diana Michelle »

Welcome to the Wonderful World of Women. Not going into a diatribe of how no means NO but this is an issue women have faced for years. I even had a guy one time tell me once when I told him I was married "So? I am too."


The most obvious answer is simple like Anthony said, just move. It may be inconvenient but sometimes we have to do what we have to do. You do need to be careful around him and if at all possible avoid any interaction. Depending on your locale you could also report him to the police as a stalker if he continues to be an issue. Best advice is to stay away and avoid any conversation and consider relocating.

If all else fails a well placed knee works too! ..OO..
Remember Ginger Rogers did everything Fred Astaire did only she did it backwards and in high heels!

The words of the prophets are written on the subway walls and tenement halls and whispered in the sounds of silence. Paul Simon
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Diana Michelle
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Re: HELP!!! A guy is trying to pick me up.

Post by Diana Michelle »

One thing I should add here, just tell him you aren't interesting. I know there may be a pet of this that is flattering but one never knows. Let him know in no uncertain terms you are flattered by the attention but he is isn't your type of guy. Hopefully he can take a hint.
Remember Ginger Rogers did everything Fred Astaire did only she did it backwards and in high heels!

The words of the prophets are written on the subway walls and tenement halls and whispered in the sounds of silence. Paul Simon
Anthony Simon
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Re: HELP!!! A guy is trying to pick me up.

Post by Anthony Simon »

You could try saying, in your best cod-Scandinavian voice, "I vant to be alone" (+look). I know it probably won't work - but humour can get you out of situations.
Socrates: The highest wisdom is to know that you know nothing.

Bill and Ted: That's us, dude.
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Michelle Diane
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Re: HELP!!! A guy is trying to pick me up.

Post by Michelle Diane »

Found out some good news today. I was chatting with Louise on the front desk and he came up in conversation. She mentioned he was checking out Sat morning as his contract in town was up. His office already has a room booked, same hotel chain, but this one is in Lexington KY. *-* *-* Problem solved :) .

Thanks for the replies everyone :)
One wears a mask for so long you forget who you are beneath it......I've now removed my mask.
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Penelope Carol
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Re: HELP!!! A guy is trying to pick me up.

Post by Penelope Carol »

That's good news, but nobody should be afraid to report someone who is harassing them. There are no excuses for it.
Penny
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Michelle Diane
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Re: HELP!!! A guy is trying to pick me up.

Post by Michelle Diane »

Penelope Carol wrote:That's good news, but nobody should be afraid to report someone who is harassing them. There are no excuses for it.
Hi Penny, Yeah I guess you're right I should have reported him but I suppose I didn't want to stir up any problems. But that's in the past I walked past his room and he's gone, house keeping were cleaning the room out.
One wears a mask for so long you forget who you are beneath it......I've now removed my mask.
Eileen (SO)
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Re: HELP!!! A guy is trying to pick me up.

Post by Eileen (SO) »

I too have been away for similar family obligations. Michelle, sorry to read that your wife passed.

Like Diana said, welcome to the life of womanhood where no means maybe later. I suppose that a Cd could take the come on as a compliment. Even after you mentioned a wife, he was still stalking you. In these situations, sometimes a very loud, Leave Me Alone, should draw the protection of unwanted attention. Putting hands on you is assault. A police report may not be necessary, but one to the hotel and his employer would be more satisfying.


Give up smoking so you don't have to be outside alone and carry pepper spray.


Eileen
Not only a wife, a girlfriend too!
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