progress on where I am with my life...

[Anne Bonny]

Writing to practically my only friend who I know personally and have met with several times though she is 30 years younger and living a wonderful life, as I used to have, with her family...it is a beautiful thing.

You haven't created a monster...all of this has always been inside of me wanting to come out so that I can be who I am and feel that I can live my life. Yeah...in this society it means knowing the limits and when and with whom it is OK to be open around. The "hypnosis" I have found one that says it is important to love yourself, that the purpose of life is to enjoy it. That when in male clothes it does not change who I am inside...it is like any other woman masquerading in male clothes and people can sense who I am inside.

A wonderful part of my life is over but that does not mean a next wonderful part cannot begin.

It is a shame a lot...most? People will never understand...or be willing to. A shame most women see us as men pretending, or masquerading telling others they must accept us as women when we are not. I don't think we understand ourselves but those of us who are sincere only know that we are different from those around us. We definitely are not natal females who grew up to be women all we know is that inside we are as women are more than we are as men are. And we are OK with that and enjoy being able to just be who we are finally as long as we can overcome all of our own fear, the years of conditioning, and the negating attacks we have to endure probably the rest of our lives. What is so wrong with living in a way that makes us feel free to be who we really are inside, and so what if that happens to be identical in many ways to the women who are around us!? What is wrong with being like the women around us!?

I suppose looking to women as our mentors and as examples leading the way.

So this is now the pathway that my life is following. I do not know where it will lead carefully managed or if I will ever meet the kind of woman I would long for inside one who can be a husband, mate and also a woman and wife in an equal relationship off on the final adventures of our lives together.

I am up to laser hair removal...ordered a home IPL device...but will have to cautiously consider and be careful to determine the best setting after testing it somewhere on my body before applying it to my face for quite a few sessions over a drawn out period of months with long periods between treatments. Yes, I am committed to who I am inside It is a further step along this pathway. $115.15 I have never sought to have any facial hair ...well tried for a fuzzy mustache for a while as a 15 to 18 year old but never again after that. It would be wonderful to have a substantially smoother face knowing electrolysis would be the only way to rid myself completely of this curse.

Oh well that is about it for now... Anne

[Wesley]

So, one of the first things I notice while catching on posts here is the total absence of Anne Bonny. . I checked the logs and she was one of the MOST POPULIST WRITERS here. . That woman could write and write until the cows came home.

It appears she just stopped in October of 2020.

I had attempted to reach out to a few times over the years, but always without any success. Clearly she was a tortured soul.

I have to wonder if she succumbed to COVID. .

Any one have any other thoughts about the matter? I have to admit that was a depressing thing about this site. People would just stop posting, and we are talking about people that used to post very regularly. .You sense they had probably passed, but do to the confidentiality of the site, no one, generally had a way to check up on others here.

[Diana Michelle]

I have thought the same about many. Very active then suddenly zero. Not sure what to say other than one can only hope and pray they have found what they were seeking.

[Wesley]

Can the board administrators, who ostensibly have access to the persons email send an email inquiring about the person? It would be nice to know if some of the posters have moved on, or passed on if possible.

That was the one troubling thing I noticed about this page some years ago. . people just dropped as if off the face of the earth and were never heard from. I dare say, should I cash in my chips, I have no objection to someone on the board knowing and posting that I had passed.

The only alternative is to have some sort of a buddy system wherein everyone on the board has at least one person here who knows their actual identity, and is in a position to at least make inquiries should the person drop off.

With regards to Anne, I have to admit, I have mixed emotions. She was always a frequent poster and let her feelings and daily struggles be known, voluptuously. . I had reached out to her on more than one occasion, but never really made a connection. Now that she has just disappeared, I have to wonder.

Wesley

[Anthony Simon]

[IMHO] You should leave people alone - to post if they want to (or not).

[Ralitsa]

I rather agree with Anthony Simon. I know that I've gone for a year or two at a time without posting or stopping by, all depends on what's going on in life.
My interpretation on the subject is that Anne Bonney was really struggling both to accept herself and dealing with the hate and negativity she was getting from her family. So this was a place for her to complain, explore her feelings, and try to work through all the acceptance barriers she was struggling with. And I felt like that was finally happening for her and things were really getting better.

Now I know it is totally inappropriate for me to speculate on other's motivations and feelings, and I beg forgiveness for that. I'm just guessing that she did get what she needed from her participation here and then moved on - and that's a really great thing! Well there is always the possibility of COVID or a sailing accident taking her away, but I'm choosing to believe that she is now fully comfortable in her life and doesn't need us anymore.

[Diana Michelle]

I hope you're right Ralista however based on dialogues I had with her I am not as confident

[Wesley]

Well, here it is late March of 2023, and it appears Anne has not posted in quite some time. I bring this up again, as I recently lost a hard drive on my older computer, and it took some time to get a new computer set up, and important accounts recovered (as my passwords were all on the computer and not written down.) I am just now getting back around to this site.

I had hoped that perhaps that was what happened with Anne, but as Diana, noted, it seems not to be the case. That is sad.

Otherwise, hope everyone is doing reasonably well.