Crossdressers-Haven.com

I joined a while ago but as I never posted I am taking the time to do it now. Although I have put on womens clothes periodically for most of my life, I only really started to fully cross dress when I moved to the USA; I am English. What started as a fetish is now firmly part of who I am. I am married so I only get limited opportunities to actually transform myself, but however much I try to believe I can stop, the truth is I can not. Each year when my family return to the UK, my femanine side comes out. Each time I progress more and more into transforming myself into a believable woman and become more comfortable in this role and find it more rewarding. Now I spend as much of this free time as a woman as I can and take every opportunity to go out as a woman, spend time with others as a Woman and interact with the world as a woman.
I do not believe that I am a woman or wish to become a woman, I am at ease with my male self, especially during the long periods I have no opportunity to transform. My wife found out a few years ago, we have overcome the initial hostility and have a stable relationship again, but she does not accept that I need to dress and is disgusted by the idea, so it is back to secrecy !!! I still need to find a voice that I am pleased with to make myself complete, I am getting better at speaking as a woman, but this is more to do with less concerned if I am "identified as a man" than I have a realistic voice. Any ideas?
As I contemplate another couple of weeks out and about as a woman again, my thoughts are with all of the other girls out there, it can be so difficult to meet up with you.
Warmest wishes to all of you
Ashley

Hi Ashley, aboard.

Welcome Ashley,

Your situation is very much like many others here. It is extremely frustrating. I was in a similar situation for many years. My
circumstances have changed so that I am now able to present as a woman most of the time. I still choose to present as a man
to my family and friends even though my daughters and husbands "know".

I hope that your participation here will help.

Hello Ashley, I am brand new to this lifestyle or fettish. I have to ask: where did you get those realistic breasts? You look amazing! I'm still trying to figure out a voice, but mostly use a singsongish( my own word thank you) type of whisper. I like being a man, and am very outdoors active. I am still trying to work out the makeup, and a dressing attire style. I am having a fun doing it! I hope I can get to a place to go out in public to enjoy my new art, and feeling, well feminine. I am sorry about your wife, but she must love you to not leave. It's good you still have opportunity to dress out and enjoy your art!

Welcome, Ashleykal!

Welcome, Ashley.

Hi, Ashley, and welcome to the Haven!


- SL

I am new, and ecstatic that I found this forum. I need to find out how to post a avatar pic, or any pic, but I will figure things out in my education of navigating this forum. Just getting kinda excited to see if anybody else sees me as I do. Not that it matters(lie), but it would be good to see some feedback...lol. All the women on this site are beautiful and helpful. This is becoming an art form for me, but the feeling is indescribable...

Hi Ashley. First off you present as a very attractive lady and for that I offer my sincerest
congratulations with the caveat that you are probably much more a woman than you think. I
was much like you when I was younger and wrongly believed I could and would be able to
suppress the feelings I should be female but I found as I got older the feelings intensified
to the extent that I needed help to deal with the dysphoria which lead to an estrogen regimen
and that in turn lead to full transition. However I can honestly say I have never been happier to
finally be able to present to the world as the real me. I made the mistake of thinking that if I was
strong enough and had sufficient will power and was determined enough I would somehow be able
to keep suppressing the trans feelings. Of course that isn't possible but by trying to do so I made
my family and myself very miserable which I regret very much. I relate my story to you so that if
you are genuine transgender it is much better to embrace who you are and be happy than to fight
against yourself which only leads to torment and misery. Good luck on your journey girl.

Hi Ashley and welcome to this supportive and friendly Haven.

You are not alone in the secrecy you have (as many of us have the same secret), however it is encouraging that you can freely move about as a women when the opportunity presents.