Fun Facts.

[Loretta Ann]

You won't believe some of these fun facts!

Coffee Break Romance
It's reported that more than 10,000 marriages
a year now are directly traceable to romances
which begin during coffee breaks.

Engagement Lengths
The average engagement lasts 6 months.

First Love
Two out of five marry their first love.

Wearing a Wedding Ring
The reason that the engagement ring and wedding band
is worn on the fourth finger of the left hand is because
the ancient Egyptians thought that the "vein of love"
ran from this finger directly to the heart.

Go Ahead and Kiss
A team of medical experts in Virginia contends that you're more likely
to catch the common cold virus by shaking hands than by kissing.

Having Sex?
According to a survey, the second most popular reason
for having sex is to produce a baby.

Strange But True
In Pennsylvania, Ministers are forbidden from performing
marriages when either the bride or groom is drunk.

Median Age for Marriage
In 1970, brides were on average 20.8 years old when they married,
while grooms were 23.2. Americans are now marrying later in life.
In the year 2000, brides were on average 25.1
with their grooms averaging 26.8.

Morning Kissing
Studies indicate that a man who kisses his wife good-bye
when he leaves for work every morning averages a higher
income than those who don't. Husbands who exercise the
rituals of affection tend to be more painstaking, more
stable, more methodical, thus, higher earners. Studies also
show that men who kiss their wives before leaving in the
morning live 5 years longer than those who don't.

Oldest Bride
Minnie Munro became the world's oldest bride when she married
Dudley Reid at the age of 102 on May 31, 1991. Reid, the groom,
was 83 years old.

Oldest Groom
Harry Stevens was 103 when he married 84 year old Thelma Lucas at
the Caravilla Retirement Home in Wisconsin on December 3, 1984.

Phone Proposals
6% of men proposed to their girlfriends over the phone.

Romance Novels
Romance Novels are more popular than
ever. 53% of all mass market paperback
books sold in this country are Romances.
Romance novels earn more money in the
USA yearly than baseball! So, what's
the national pastime?

Sex Manuals
The oldest sex manuals were published in China 5,000 years ago.

The Longest Engagement
Sixty-seven years, according to the Guinness Book of World Records.
The happy couple finally wed at age 82!

[Tea Cake]

I think its wonderfully romantic that 2 out of five marry their first-love---and the Egyptian Vein of Love---sounds like a RACEY MOVIE TITLE hahahaha------have any more lovely facts?

[Loretta Ann]

I don't presently have any more, perhaps others would like to add some here?
Glad you enjoyed it Tea Cake.

[Loretta Ann]

It is not wise to count your friends
on a bright sunny day.
When the sky is blue
and smiles come so easliy.

Instead wait for a storm,
when the clouds are dark
and the day grows cold.
Laughter is not heard
in your heavy heart.

Then when a friend comes
and stands beside you
and lifts your spirits to the sky
and laughter is in your heart,
he or she deserves the name...friend.

[Loretta Ann]

Four All Who Reed and Right
===========================

We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes;
but the plural of ox became oxen not oxes.

One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
yet the plural of moose should never be meese.

You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice;
yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.

If the plural of man is always called men,
why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?

If I spoke of my foot and show you my feet,
and I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?

If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?

Then one may be that, and three would be those,
yet hat in the plural would never be hose, and the plural of cat
is cats, not cose.

We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
but though we say mother, we never say methren.

Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
but imagine the feminine, she, shis and shim.

Let's face it,
English is a crazy language.

There is no egg in eggplant,
nor ham in hamburger;
neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
English muffins weren't invented in England.

We take English for granted.
But if we explore its paradoxes,
we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square
and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea, nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing,
grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?

Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends,
but not one amend?

If you have a bunch of odds and ends
and get rid of all but one of them,
what do you call it?

If teachers taught,
why didn't preachers praught?

If a vegetarian eats vegetables,
what does a humanitarian eat?

Sometimes, I think all the folks who grew up speaking English
should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane.

In what other language do people recite at a play
and play at a recital?

Ship by truck and send cargo by ship?

Have noses that run and feet that smell?

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same,
while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which
your house can burn up as it burns down;
in which you fill in a form by filling it out
and in which an alarm goes off by going on.

[Loretta Ann]

A North Carolina man, having bought several expensive cigars, insured
them against... get this... fire. After he had smoked them, he then
decided that he had a claim against the insurance company and filed.
The insurance company refused to pay, citing the obvious reason
that the man had consumed the cigar normally. The man sued.

The judge stated that since the company had insured the cigars
against fire, they were obligated to pay. After the man accepted
payment for his claim, the company then had him arrested
...for arson.

[Curly(SO)]

That cigar joke has put a big smile on my face!
Thank you Darlene!

[Kyra]

Hey Y'all,
I loved the cigar bit too, and it wouldn't surprise me at all if that were actually true. Some people are unbelievable.

I thought about posting this under its own topic, but felt it would fit snugly here. It's called good advice and everytime i read it, I just feel a little better about being alive.

Good Advice

1. Throw out non-essential numbers. This includes age, weight
and height. Let the doctor worry about them. That is why you pay
him/her.

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts,
gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. "An idle mind is the devil's
workshop," The devil's name is Depression.

4. Enjoy the simple things. When the children are young,
that is all that you can afford. When they are in college, that is all that
you can afford. When you are on retirement that is all that you can
afford.

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for
breath. Laugh so much that you can be tracked in the store by your distinctive laughter.

6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only
person who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be alive while you are
alive, don't put out a mailbox on the highway of death and just wait in
residence for your mail.

7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether it is
family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.

8. Cherish your health. If it is good, preserve it. If it is
unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9. Don't take guilt trips. Go to the mall, the next county,
a foreign country, but not to guilt country.

10. Tell the people you love, that you love them, at every
opportunity.

And always remember . . .

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take
But by the moments that take our breath away.

* * * * * * * * * *
THEY SAY
It takes a minute to find a special person
An hour to appreciate them
A day to love them
But then an entire life to forget them.



Hugs,
Kyra

[Loretta Ann]

Thank you Kyra.

I am passing this on to some of my friends. You are right it's Good Stuff.

[Loretta Ann]

Some friends are like a flower,
and when they finally bloom,
they wilt away in just a day,
and sometimes just by noon.

Some friends are like a cloudy day,
and when the sun's in sight,
are blocked by the grayest cloud
and their day turns into night.

Some friends are like a maple tree,
and with the slightest breeze,
the colored leaves, they all come loose
and float away with ease.

Some friends are like a circle,
for they are always true,
just one of lifes many roses
the kind I apire to pursue.

[Tea Cake]

Oh Captain, Oh Captain
Where do the winds take you today?
----Ms Mermaid

[Gaven McLaren]

The cigar story regarding the arson charge is a true story.

[Loretta Ann]

Man Vs. Woman


Success:
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

The Morning:
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

Money Management:
A man is a person who will pay two dollars for a one dollar item he wants.
A woman will pay one dollar for a two dollar item that she doesn't.

Happiness:
To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand
her at all.

Marriage Expectations:
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change and she does.

Marriage Decisions:
Men marry because they are tired.
Women marry because they are curious.
Both are disappointed.

Marriage and the Future:
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

Memories:
A woman will always cherish the memory of the man who wanted to marry
her. A man cherishes the memory of the woman who he didn't marry.

Understanding Women:
There are two times when a man doesn't understand a woman - before
marriage and after marriage.

What a Woman Wants:
Only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy:
One is to let her think she is having her own way.
The other is to let her have it.

Longevity:
Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot more
willing to die.

Mistakes:
Any married man should forget his mistakes - no use two people remembering
the same thing.

The Battle:
A woman always has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

[Loretta Ann]

So much of success in life has to do with
how well you are able to bounce like a ball.

Some of us bounce like a multi-colored super-ball
while others like a lead cannonball.

[Caroline]

Hi Darlene,

I've just read through this thread, and the stuff of yours is great. If it's your own work, you DO have a future in gag-writing--if you're not one already, that is.

Kind regards,

Caroline.