Crossdressers-Haven.com

I finally made contact with a Trans leader in our area Molly Kester, https://youtu.be/FTiQrKxw_FA" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false; and after emailing back and forth she came right to my home where we met and talked a long long time it seemed, hard to believe it only lasted about an hour. We covered so much ground and I felt so reassured about everything after it was truly a life changing event. I wrote to my friend and she stated:

(I saw her radio interview on youtube, she's awesome and it was by the radio network she works for I heart radio).

Oh we are now connected on messenger and we have messaged some...it's so awesome!!!

F: WOW

F: THAT'S AWESOME!!!

"She is an engineer for 3 radio stations. I heart radio . But her major concern is working with and for Transgender rights
Told me at 10 am every Sunday at the original site of the church of the redeemer there is an Episcopal service there are many LGBT that attend even dressed of course...the other side of what used to be class rooms for the original Church of the redeemer on the beach washed away by katrina... now rebuilt north of the bay...Is a place that feeds the homeless in the same building. I used to attend church there in the 80s. She said even a few atheists attend, a Buddhist
The father is gay. Well I told her I am an agnostic. She encouraged me to come so I plan on going Sunday. As a way of meeting people. We connected by messenger there are several sites she'll send me. And there's an event in October to raise money... I believe defense against laws seeking to infringe on transgender rights for the ACLU. Oh well talked about everything, told her 'bout my sister as my reason for not being out. She shared her experiences she is out to her family and has been fortunate that they all accepted her and states she has never had any trouble on the coast. There are friendly bars and restaurants and she shops at Walmart all the time. Too much room relate it all and to remember. When I walked the dog I put on my rings, bracelet watch and small studs...somehow she made me feel so much better about it...

Says she gets calls from New York interested in her and what she's doing. Her phone rang 4 to 5 times as we talked.

Told her about the social group but I need someone who can love me as I am...that I feel they would talk behind my back and back away if they knew. (she is 56, said most of the ones in our area are much younger).

Told her you had urged me to make contact and that you have been there knowing everything and have helped me. ( I also told her about this site and that there's a lady up in Michigan who has also been urging me to make contact with the local LGBT+ community...Diane of course!)

Even remember telling her at age 9 wandering through an empty apartment next to my grandma's house I found what must have been a maternity dress and the idea came to slip out of my clothes and into that dress...and became aware and there was no going back again. At 9 you don't understand anything only that something has happened and I could do nothing about it...I was different...and it has been this way ever since. Last 30 years came finally to be comfortable, this is who I am...the work now is to come out.

I am male but my brain is female in part but not to the extent of a trans sexual...or...have I just been forced to live the male role...conditioning, socialization etc...so that could be I am more female than I realize. She agreed it's possible. I believe drawing on what she learned from her therapist.

Her gender therapist is listed on the site...she's had top surgery and is on hormones...

I wish I had a female body at times too...but who knows...for now... I feel It's not the right move but down the road who knows probably not it all depends I guess?

It was a long conversation, we got on very well with our common life experience.

Gee...Ordered a new purse because I have never had one I purchased for myself...an ameribag healthy back bag in a chocolate brown opted for no designer flourish just plain...a small one 17"x9"x6" similar to one my wife had that I liked only hers is worn and in black she used it alot. Purchased some make up, nail polish, running shorts, more panties so I have a full supply as many as I have for my male side, more. A pretty necklace that has a leaf with the first letter of the name and birthstone color for myself, my wife, and our sons...I was not a mother but as a woman I carry our family and who we were and are in my heart and always will...came this morning and I am wearing it 4 leafs and 4 stones...the stones may not be actual but they are pretty with the leaves for $68.95....I did not have a pretty necklace of my very own that I really liked and had been wearing my 24" gold chain and Anchor which may be a male necklace but I still like to wear it too. Oh well... enough for now...

My dentist is listed on the msrainbowcenter site so I was completely comfortable and not self conscious about the length of my hair couple days back. I have walked the dog wearing all my jewelry it was late. I have been dressing more full time well edging and working in the yard not... but I have jogged and that is why I purchased some better women's athletic shorts to wear running in...

Good job reaching out to someone.

GOOD FOR YOU! Yay!

Truly, I am glad for you Anne. We all need someone to lean on this sounds perfect.

Yeah, thanks! Just purchased form prescription women's glasses that darken in sunlight...and over the past few days a purse, and some more things. I have been jogging and walking the dog and getting out, but I do not believe anyone can tell really from a distance because shorts, a t shirt and running shoes could go either way...hum. I will be going to the Episcopal church Sunday but I am an agnostic...it is more a way to meet people in the community. Yep, I am making progress and want to push toward being out more I could drive to the beach and walk at dusk....I need to be getting out! I have also been putting male clothes aside and wearing female clothes except had an appointment on base...to the commissary...I do not plan in a very testosterone rich environment of a military base going as Anne...that would be like going out in a crowd of conservative religious rednecks and doing the same thing...though on base I would probably would not be beat up.

I am an agnostic...but My contact and mentor locally encouraged me to come to her local church. This extremely small chapel in the class rooms that used to be part of the main Church that was demolished partially by Hurricane Camille in 1969, then wiped out in Katrina...so the main Church is now located north of the bay sadly because the old church had been there since the mid 19th century and the view is beautiful of the gulf and of a barrier island just off shore. Of course the move made rational sense because the church was a sitting duck for all the surges that come with frequent hurricanes along the coast. In the 1980's as a confirmed Episcopal this was my second church and when I arrived I found it extremely stiff, stodgy, conservative and traditional with no give what so ever because of the large number of elderly in attendance. Eventually I moved on and in the years that came there was a schism in which the conservative Episcopal church was forced to move out of properties they had held and they had to start over while the liberal branch continued on.

So I showed up at 10 am to a small chapel in what used to be the class room building of the original church, a soup kitchen is run out of another part of this same building. The small chapel has a large window behind the table where the Father conducts the service and the view is beautiful of the beach, the gulf and the island beyond. The Father does the service without pay, he is openly gay and introduced me to his husband, they were both very nice. aside from my contact...Molly who is Trans I was the only other transgender there the rest were of the L,G component primarily men but there was also a social worker and his wife present. All together I would say there were certainly not more than 15 present including the Father and his spouse. But though this is the smallest such church I have ever attended this was the very first time I was fully welcomed for all of who I am, and I am welcome to come with no judgement of my appearance. In fact Molly was in a maxi dress and 6 inch heeled sandals and was asked to assist the Father with communion. Molly also told me I was welcome to drive to her apartment to change before attending and to change back after the service if I was worried about my neighbor. We are connected on messenger. I stay off face book with any posts like these because my sister is on it frequently...the one who does not know and who would definitely not approve...the one sticking point blocking my ability to be coming out fully and openly to everyone and to the public. So... though I am agnostic I did take communion...who knows? and the message provided was of course directed at the needs of this congregation who feel society gives us no status, and treats us as if we are nonpersons. It was comforting and uplifting so this is going to be a very good step in the right direction for me. Who knows? I may finally be able to wear a dress to church as many women to. But following the herd...it is such a small and informal service that the gg ladies were in slacks or shorts and casual attire and I would of course follow their lead because I am a woman too as Anne comes. I will only dress when I am comfortable, relaxed and when I do feel the feminine presence within myself because I am not dressing to push any point, or to show myself off, I am not an exhibitionist who feels a thrill or an adrenaline rush from being dressed in front of others. I dress because it is who I am inside and the clothing merely reflects who I am on the inside. Of course like water in a clear pond with heavy silt on the bottom, Stress, worry, emotions, etc can chase my inner femm away and hence I would not desire to dress at such times...It is funny how the mind works...but I only dress when I am comfortable and relaxed and when my who I am sense is set to the feminine part of who I am, I refuse and would not need a feminine exterior appearance if Anne is not there.