Let's be Honest

[Anne Bonny]

I suppose from now on my posts will consist of things...Like you know...there's absolutely nothing wrong with how I choose to dress. I am a balancing act everyday I suppose...mind is ok...but how I feel inside I mean in regards to gender is subject to change. So what? If I feel female and dress as a female? This just happens to be who I am on the inside from time to time. Don't know why I feel a need to declare this over and over again...maybe I am looking for validation but I should really be ok with validating myself from within. I suppose that really should be enough. I do seem to be spending more time female but I do think it's much less than half the time still If I could not give expression to this part of who I am inside I would probably be climbing the walls...going insane inside. You cannot stop a river from flowing eventually it will flow over any obstruction to stop it. I do apologize for writing again and again and again and driving everybody away... maybe I am also asserting my right to be who I happen to be as well. I may keep a low profile, and restrict it to within my own home when It comes and only to those few who do happen to know but that is my choice. sorry.

My validation does come from within....no one knows how it is inside of me but me...and from that also comes my basic human right to be who I am.

I suppose too it's something women can neither understand nor accept. I mean I am not a woman...there is only this driving essence of woman inside. An identification and feeling of connection on some wavelengths...

I also love to hang out with and talk to women.

[Anne Bonny]

There is more to it than clothes....it's what is inside of who I am...gaw!! I feel close and connected to women and who they are ....IN SOME WAYS...obviously just identify..feel the essence of femdom...feel as if I am with women on their team...closely aligned but obviously as a male... cannot ever be fully there. So I like to stick up for women...hey! That's not right! Don't take that! You're every bit as good as anybody else!!!. But the clothes enhance my feeling connected. I have slacks. Shorts. Jean's and tops and I do wear them...but I feel I was deprived because I was not allowed to wear dresses and skirts when because of how I am inside I wanted to...not sure if the preference will always be there for such over pants...maybe in time I won't feel that desire to make up for what was denied? I think I love women so much I can't help desiring to be like them because I feel like them inside...

I suppose....I'm making up for lost time...AND I With a little help from my friends...gaw you've created a monster because I am free to be who I am now...so...it's happening all the time now...daily this girl is out of the box and isn't going back in anymore! I do have to present and be and go back to my Male self most of the time...but Anne...gaw a little scary but she's here now and is here more..gaw so I wonder...but subject to change...how I am and who is subject to change...

Yeah, I am a guy who feels more like a girl, wish I could have been one at times and is in their clothes because I do...the tide changes and back to the Male baseline I go...gaw this is who I am please accept me.

I am glad you are my friend.

For this to become real...I have to be openly be who I am without fear no matter where I am or who I am with. I will be seen as different...unique? I'm not the only femme man around. It will mean rejection. But also acceptance some will surprise me, and there will be new friends too. Not saying I'm coming out just that..I should but...hum

Not anytime soon.

Freedom to be free of gender because it's who we are. I have finally made it! I am finally where I am supposed to be.. With the correct understanding of it.