Is this sort of confusion common amongst us??

[Eloise Goth]

Ok, I know I'm not gay..but when I dress-which is everyday, I get bi -sexual urges.
do any of you have these feelings? if so did you act on them and did you enjoy it?
I ask this because I've just registered at a gay dating website.

[Rebecca]

Hi Eloise,

Iv'e never had those urges myself, though I could understand the desire to be taken as a woman. Though then it would have to be with another woman, so I don't suppose that counts either. I don't find men sexy at all, including myself, all the hair, the wrong smell etc etc.

I think it can be confusing if you mix gender issues with sexuality, as they are seperate parts of a person's make-up (like mascara and lipstick). I once read that this desire when dressed can be a desire to experience more of what it is like to be a woman, but whether this is acted upon is down a to a person's sexuality.
If you are confused, then maybe try to compare your feelings when either dressed or not dressed.

It's just an idea, this is totally off the top off my head, (hey, I wonder what else is up there ?)

Love
Rebecca xxx

[Beauty]

Hi Eloise,

Tough subject. We do have bi members here and they are welcomed.

Discussion about that topic on this forum is asked that it be kept to what you just did asking questions about it, but not necessarily talking about anything that wouldn't be G rated.

This is kind of an un-spoken rule here. So, for those who follow Eloise's post, I'm asking that we all please be respectful of the SOs and family members who come to find out about who the CD'ing individual in their life is. It is assumed by people who know about this that we are automatically gay or bi and usually this is not the case.

We've had these kinds of discussions before and they went ok, but it's been a while and we've had lots of new members, so I just want to make sure the conversations stay in check. Feel free to PM those who voluntarily would like to talk about this in a way that might not be considered G rated.

Thanks everyone and thanks Eloise. These are usually good threads that cast a huge light on the degrees of TG'd people out there.

Beauty

[Beauty]

Ok, so what about me?

Well, I'm with Rebecca. I don't really find men attractive.

In fact if I had to I would classify myself as a TG'd lesbian. That's only if I had to say if I was a female gender (not sex).

Broad generalization time:
Men are typically hairy, sloppy, not soft, not pretty and men.
End broad generalization

I am not attracted to them period.

The sexual feelings I had were because I was aroused by the woman I saw in the mirror and because it was a secret that no one new but me, it was even more erotic. So my sexual feelings ended up only being about me being attracted to the female gendered me. Very odd, but I didn't realize this until I shared my CD'ing with my wife and she accepted it.

I do not seek self gratification when dressed anymore. I do dress when my wife and I are together romantically, but I don't dress just because we're going to be intimate. Now when I dress and she's not there it's incredibly boring and definitely not arousing.

Ok. That's it. I think I sounded off enough. I'll just make it worse if I continue babbling.

Beauty

[Eloise Goth]

thank you both for the comments. I shall keep things so clean that even a nun could read the thread without blushing!!
my bi urges revolve around cd's...I find them so beautiful. non dressers are, as Beauty put it, repulsive.

[Gelinda]

Well: I have to save I have worried about it a time or too but I know now that there is no way I would be with another guy. I will only be with the woman of my life, my wife of 24 and half years. I will only be in bed with her and no one else.

I still can not understand the why''s of why I CD. Wish I did then I could have alot of better nights. I still fight with myself on this issue.

Gee

[Beauty]

Hi Eloise,

Oh you're saying you at times have been attracted to other CD'rs?

Hmmm.. Ok, that would be a new topic. I have no idea how to bring that one up. For me they are still men under there, but like a pretty gal I have found other CD'rs super attractive.

Thanks for clearing up what you mean exactly. This should make the thread a bit different from the normal bi curious threads we've had pop up over time.

Beauty

[SophieLawson]

Hiya Eloise,

I never have and never will be attracted to men, if I'm dressed up or not But I don't dress for sexual reasons really, I dress just because I do, don't know why. All I will say is, if I was dressed and out in a club or something, I would still be checking out the girls. Honestly I've kinda thought since about age of 13 when sexual things started to happen that I would never be able to get a girlfriend because girls wouldn't want to date a cross dresser.

You girls with SO's who don't mind you dressing don't know how lucky you really are! Look after them that's all I'll say

Sophie xx

[SophieLawson]

my bi urges revolve around cd's...I find them so beautiful. non dressers are, as Beauty put it, repulsive.

Ahhhh, now that's a different kettle of fish lol I can't answer that one A transexual maybe, a cross dresser I dunno honestly.

Sophie xx

[Jassmine(SO)]

Hi Y'all

Now, I wouldn't consider myself bi-sexual by any stretch of the imagination, but I have been sexually attracted to other women. I have also had otherwise "straight" women sexually attracted to me. Beauty, especially inner beauty, is apparently quite a turn on for a lot of folks. Those women who I found myself attracted to had this incredible inner beauty I guess I had a desire to get closer to them because of it. Making love involves all levels physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual. And spiritual beauty can be more attractive than physical beauty.

*Hugs & Love*

[Celia]

The thought of women having sex with one another does little for me. The thought of men doing so, even less. The thought of men and women? That has some possibilities . . .

Having some sort of physical thing going on with some man while I'm en femme seems too problematic for me to even consider. If I were to come to some realization that I was transsexual, however, and thereupon transition (therapy, hormones, hair-removal treatments, surgeries, voice lessons, legal name and gender change--the whole nine yards), I don't see myself trying to become physically involved with women. Under those conditions, for me to have a physical relationship with a man (not just any man, of course--I do have my standards ) seems appropriate, even appealing. So, if I were to pull up roots and plant myself firmly on the other side of the gender fence, I guess I'd take my sexual orientation with me.

-Celia

[CJ]

Hi all,

Yes, Eloïse, sometimes there is confusion. It's a "Plato's cavern" type of confusion--a disagreement between our attraction to appearance (based on a heterosexual orientation) and our attraction to reality (based on what would then become a homosexual, or bisexual, orientation).

For me, I'll always be hearing the words of "Doc," in John Carpenter's 1984 remake of The Thing, as he gazes upon the remains of the creature on his autopsy slab: "S'that a man in there, or sum'thin'?"

Love,
CJ

[Virginia]

WEll, statistically speaking, evidence points to the fact that the vast majority of (true, pure, "virgin" whatever we define ourselves) Crossdressers are hetrosexual males with no bi-sexual tendencies, BUT there are exceptions to every norm and there ai't nuttin wrong with that either. We as CD'ERS and (my theory) the leading edge of a form of human evolution, offer to humankind a variety of acceptable approaches to this new and improved form of human!
Wow! did I write that? Too much tea!
Love ya,
Virginia

[Wendy Seymone]

Here is a link that may be helpful...
http://www.genderpsychology.org/autogynephilia/

The term autogynephilia was coined in 1989 by Ray Blanchard, a clinical psychologist at the Clarke Institute of Psychiatry in Toronto. He defined autogynephilia as "the propensity to be sexually aroused by the thought or image of oneself as a woman." ... Blanchard hypothesized that there are two fundamentally different types of gender dysphoric males: those who are exclusively or almost exclusively aroused by men, i.e., who are androphilic ; and all the rest, who, as it turns out, are primarily aroused by the idea of being women, i.e., who are autogynephilic.

[Merinda]

Another term for a crossdresser in full mode is " GENDER ILLUSIONIST "
I think that discribes what we are presenting.

Eloise ,
If you find other CDers sexually attractive I would say that you are probably attracted to the image , not the person underneath.
There is the world of fantasy and the world of reality , the reality is you probably dont want to see whats under my skirt.