Ivanka

[Ivanka]

Hi! Due to the family and religious commitments, I have been fighting Ivanka (the girl inside of me) for the last 4 years approximately. But I started cross-dressing again just 3 days ago. I might get back to fighting it again in future. There is a belief that each of us has the potential to fight our sins. However, at the end of the last battle I just started to hate the world, which is probably not very correct in the religious prospective either. Besides, cross-dressing is a sort of obsession for me and being banned it makes the obsession even stronger, so I could not concentrate on anything. I have not being doing things I have to do to earn for living lately because the fighting has taken all my life energy. Well, having allowed myself to crossdress I am all into crossdressing now. Again not doing other things But I think this is just an after-effect. This is only the 3d day and I just can’t get enough. I spent the whole day yesterday cross-dressing and I took some pictures of Ivanka. I think I will be able to pull myself together soon. I have to. Otherwise, one of my excuses for crossdressing is not good. Are there any good excuses for crossdressing anyway? I don’t think so. I know what most of you are going to say. Crossdressing does not need excuses, it’s fun, just be whatever you want to be. There is no shame in that. True. But only if you are not Christian.

[Davita]

Personally I don't believe in organized religion. Your intro is a perfect example of why I don't. However, that doesn't mean I have ignored those who might need some help with their faith. Check out my web page with links to churches including those of Christian faith: http://davita-farley.webs.com/reference/support_2.html. Hopefully you can find a place that will give you what you need.

And welcome to the Forum.

[Ginny Jones]

Ivanka - welcome to the forum! Sounds like a real difficult place for you to be right now! I hope that you manage to find some peace for yourself, if only to get a break from all this fighting!

Hugs Ginny x

[Anthony Simon]

Welcome, Ivanka.

There were many things is your post, but I want just to pick out:

However, at the end of the last battle I just started to hate the world, which is probably not very correct in the religious prospective either.

A rule of thumb states that if someone hates the world (or everyone else) what they really hate is themself. This is a bad, bad, bad place to be. Please don't stay there. Dress up, come here and talk, whatever, but don't stay in that place.

[Anita]

Hi Ivanka--
Welcome to the forum! Your intro certainly gets things off and running quickly. I helped one forum friend here find a Christian crossdressing site, which seems to be gone. But you can type "crossdressers for Christ" into Google, and get a number of sites that come up. Churches may officially be against CDing, but that doesn't mean there aren't devout members who are fighting themselves just like you are.

My girlfriend still holds onto her particular faith, even though she can't attend church as long as she wants to be the woman she is, at church. But as she says, "The gospel (of her church) is correct. The people who interpret it may not be." Her church was also racist, but over the decades, they acknowledged they were wrong about this. She tries to avoid judging them for what they do in the here/now with transgender people.

As for becoming obsessed with CDing--all I can say to that it that it may pass, once you've been doing it again for a longer period. I had never had clothes, wigs, shoes, or makeup, and when I bought these things for the first time, I went crazy for a month or two. Then it tapered off, and went on to manageable levels of dressing. It's just like any other new relationship--you get infatuated with the "new" person in your life. In this case, she's your own girlself.

[Sarah Ann]

Hi, Ivanka,

I personally am Christian and transgendered, and manage to balance the two. Maybe we can talk about this later, in some other part of the forum

Welcome, and I hope you enjoy your visits here

[Ivanka]

Thank you for trying to help. But no. I am here not to discover truth or to balance cross-dressing with the religion. I think it’s natural that the God makes sure you know what they want through the Bible and the official church. By the way, I believe in the orthodox religion, which is not changing everyday in the attempt to make the society happy. If this religion is bullshitting, I would not care about God at all. So, let’s not talk about the religion. I know I started it myself but that was only to help you understand me better, where I am coming from. So far, the best answer for me is Miss Golden Goddess’s one. Though it’s also sort of debatable. For example, let’s imagine I have a penchant 4 killing people. What? Shall I keep shooting people to keep myself out of being depressed? No. You would not agree to that. The fact that you are not hurt by my crossdressing does not mean it’s not a sin. Well, I guess I would not be telling more about that. Believe it or not, it’s up to you. God leave us the right to choose.

[Ivanka]

I have cropped my photo to create an avatar so that you can see my face now

[Ivanka]

I've just created my facebook profile. If you are there too, plz request friendship via PM.


** Facebook link deleted by SL. Members may contact Ivanka via PM for a link to that page. - SL * *

[Carly]

Welcome Ivanka

[DonnaT]

Hi Ivanka, to the forum.

I know you didn't come here to talk religion, which we don't particularly allow, but in the context of believing CDing is a sin, just know that it is not, no matter your religion or lack thereof.

You might consider http://throughthecracks.org/Deut21_5.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false; ...........

Note that Deut. 22:1-4 and 6-9 basically teach do no harm. The modern translation for Deut. 22:5 clearly does not fit this teaching. ...............

It should have been translated as something like: "Never cause or force a warriors Weapon to be used by a (woman or weak person); neither dress warriors armor on a (woman or weak person) for to YAHVEH, GOD of HOST, disgusting is such that do so." ................

The bible is silent with regard to the term transgender because the word transgender was not known then. Eunuch, however, was well known..........

Isaiah 56:4-5
For thus saith the LORD unto the eunuchs that keep my sabbaths, and choose the things that please me, and take hold of my covenant; Even unto them will I give in mine house and within my walls a place and a name better than of sons and of daughters: I will give them an everlasting name, that shall not be cut off..................

Matthew 19:12..................
For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother's womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it..............

Some Eunuchs were gay, some dressed as women, some were sterile, some castrated, etc. There were number of different reason to be labeled a Eunuch..............

However, generally, a Eunuch is usually considered to be someone who was sterile, by birth or by castration, however, one must ask how such a Eunuch was easily identified on the street? Did he dress different? If so, how?..................

Also, in Genesis we find the story of Leah and her giving Jacob a number of sons. In some Jewish teachings, Leah supposedly prayed that she have a daughter, and God turned one son to a daughter while in her womb, and she was named Dinah...................

[Martina H.]

Hi Ivanka your intro is very moving,
I was brought up as a christian but in MHO I do not think that God was against many things that we read from the Bible that others have interpreted and changed the wording that people hold as true within the meaning.
Let me put it this way you can be a good christian to all people without attending church. I have seen many do gooders that attend church that make themselves out to be christians and have witnessed their other side.
I do hope that my post does not offend anyone.

[Ivanka]

Thank you again for trying to teach me the truth about the religion. Very inspiring. I am nearly there. I am about to trust you that there are no sins and there is no hell.
Seriously, you never surprise me saying the bible was mistranslated. I’ve heard such opinions before. However, like I sad in my 2d post I think it’s only natural that the God makes sure you know what they want through the Bible and the official Orthodox Church. Anything else is the attempt to make yourself happy.
If there are mistakes in how the official Orthodox Church understands what God expects from us, no one goes to hell. If what DonnaT saying were true I would not worry about God at all. I would be able to excuse any sin. Just imagine the following conversation with the God:
- Why? There were mistakes here and there, misleading and contradicting interpretation of what is sinful, what is not. It’s only natural I got confused and I thought there was no sin in killing that person, who loved you, my Lord. I knew you loved him, so I just assisted to let you face each other faster. I thought it would please you both.
What would you say to that? I would say it sounds ridiculous. But that’s just a logical development of your “logic”. Agree? Don’t agree? Up to you. Like I said the God leaves us the right to choose.

[Ivanka]

I can not believe I have to say that but if you want to inspire me, you’d better say something like: “It’s a shame you have to fight such a beauty...” Do you find me good-looking at all? I know I have to make more photos to prove myself beautiful. I just made a couple and my camera (which I had not been using for a while) battery got dead. By the time I recharged it, I had to wear my male clothes. But I guess I will make more soon. A wig is on the way. I hope it will contribute to my beauty. Meanwhile is there anyone on facebook who wants to be friends with me? ** Link deleted by SL. **

[SilverLady(SO)]

Hi, Ivanka, and welcome to the Forum!


- SL