Growing my own hair out...

[Bernice]

I've always wanted to do this. Now, at almost age 64, I'm actually doing it.

My brother had waist length hair... much to my mother's chagrin.

It is less expensive - no more $20 haircuts every month, which is good since health insurance now exceeds 100% of our income.

It won't stay out of my eyes, so I use a hairband. In back, it now reaches the nape of my neck and feels so good. I can put a hair ring on it, and it will actually stay on.

What it doesn't do is look feminine, even if I part it in the middle. It is very fine and very limp.

It might look a lot more feminine if I would cut bangs, but I don't have the courage to do that. Still, my oral hygienist said today that she liked my hair, so that is something.

Any ideas?

Hugs,

Bernice

[KimberlyS]

I would say to let it grow for a while now that you can put it in a pony tail. Talk to your stylist and get ideas for a femme style that works with your hair and face shape.

[Karen Ski]

Good for you Bernice!

As much as a PITA curling irons and long hair can be I wouldn't trade it for the world.

[Heather W]

^ Amen to that one, Karen! I know when I felt comfortable to go au natural so to speak was a huge day for me. It does take longer to get ready in the morning and yes there are bad hair days but those are pony tail or put it up in a bun days.

[Anne Bonny]

I am nearly 6 months from my last masculine hair cut...will blow through that because it really is not that long. Being fluid...I am searching for a compromise length...much longer than the typical male hair cut these days but able to be styled male when there....while at the same time able to achieve a very real feminine style when I am there.

Yes, It is now long enough that I am very pleased when I am feeling femm and look in the mirror and see Anne. I love having hair that is long enough to achieve a true woman's hair style. There is no going back. Many men have hair that is much longer...and I may blow through the 6 month mark and head for 7!

I can do a central part and it looks wonderful. In time it may even go to chin length it is currently down the back of my neck to the base of the neck, and on the sides I can pull it down nearly to the tip of my ear lobes. Yeah...still too short.

[Deidre Taylor]

Congratulations Bernice. Like several have noted it does take more work and certainly adds time to getting ready in the morning but it does feel so good as the breeze softly brushes your hair across your face. Enjoy!

[Anne Bonny]

Oh...I didn't advise...Yeah I am lucky have large natural waves and curls so I am lucky... Use L'Oreal Extraordinary oil in it they also make a shampoo with the oil in it, and a conditioner...even a total repair balm. I have been advised to do the two drops of oil after getting out of the shower and definitely if I plan on using the blow drier! I know if I use a brush to lift my hair to hit it with the blow drier underneath that it can add even more volume then you switch to combing and hit a little from the top. I am quite lucky I suppose. Do you dye your hair to restore your natural color? I believe the coating of the dye ...really helps as older hair is thinner and drier... I do not wash it every day, and tend not to blow dry it except occasionally if I am styling it as heat can damage our hair.

I am lucky I can part my hair and it is beautiful I can sweep it back on both sides and with make up and ear rings ...it is really wonderfully thrilling to see myself in the mirror and it even bolsters my sense of who I am as a woman! I am able to look up and shake my hair and it is just amazing...I will never have short hair ever again because I am not and have never been fully male...Men who are fully male do not do any of this! These things never enter into their heads but these things have been in mine since I was at least 9 or probably younger?

There are volumizing shampoos...then there are also curlers...I have never tried them and right now have no need...maybe if I were mainstream and were going to some special event...

You hair dresser may have ideas as they see loads of women so if anyone knows they would from a wide range of hair types, styles, experiences....Anne

[Bernice]

Thank you all for your thoughtful replies. Even just hearing what you do helps - you are not required to give advice.

My hair finally reaches just past the base of my neck in back, but is still about 3 inches too short to reach the bottom of my chin in front. I laid in a stash of plastic hairbands, and they help a lot, as long as the wind is less than 2 mph. It's amazing how easily they break. Not designed for my fat head, I guess.

I am in awe of mother nature - how she figured out how to get hair to work its way into the space behind my glasses, and whip my retinas. Pushing the hair behind my ear doesn't work. It won't stay. I vaguely recall back in the early 1980s when I had hair almost this long. The only way I could drive in warm weather was to wear a hairnet. I had actually tried goggles, and they worked, but also inspired too many comments from other people.

Eventually, late this winter, I tried a pony-tail with fabric rubber bands. My hair is too fine and too slippery for that. It took some doing, but after much wrangling, I finally figured out how to use a contraption called a Barret. Actually, the package says "No slip grip". Whatever. It claims it won't pull out hair, but I haven't been so fortunate. It does, however, keep the hair out of my eyes for at least 5-10 minutes at a time, unless the wind is above 2 mph.

They say nothing worth doing is ever easy. Whatever. Soon I will be seeking lower necklines... love the feel.

Hugs,

Bernice

[Emily Rose]

I also have fine hair. There are some nice elastic hair ties that are textured with ridges, and some that have what I think is a silicone stripe running along them. These are the only ones that worked for me in the first year or so. It has been just over two years and I can use any of the stretchy hair ties. I am so glad I decided to grow my hair out.

On a funny note, I am a substitute teacher and I work in male mode for safety and financial reasons. This is a conservative area of Michigan. I will wear plain barbell earrings--just small balls on the end in black or silver--and wear my hair in a ponytail. Today I subbed at a small-town high school and was asked by three different students:

-What kind of car do you drive? (She was surprised it is a Buick century and not a motorcycle)
-Have you ever played in a rock band?
-Do you play guitar?

Two years ago, they always just asked if I am a grandpa. LOL

[Bernice]

Today I subbed at a small-town high school and was asked by three different students:

-What kind of car do you drive? (She was surprised it is a Buick century and not a motorcycle)
-Have you ever played in a rock band?
-Do you play guitar?

Every once in a blue moon I manage to get my left index nail and right thumbnail to grow almost 1/4 inch beyond the fingertip before it breaks off. Every time I went to my favorite bakery for a loaf of genuine sourdough, on a Saturday when the owner was working the front counter, he would notice my thumbnail and ask if I played guitar. It was as if he kept wondering if his question would inspire me, or if I would eventually confess. For the record, I dabbled for about a year in the 1970s, and that was it for me. My fingers hurt too much with those steel strings.

Hugs,

Bernice

[Heather W]

Bernice, they still make the old fashioned stretchy cloth head band, have you considered one of those? I think my hair is a bit longer than yours and I drive a convertible so I know what hair flying in the wind can be. A simply scrunchy works for me but I have also used a scarf to tie up a pony tail. You could also try pinning it with clips or bobby pins.

[Bernice]

Heather: I had really long hair in 1984... between jobs. With a car that had no AC. I learned to wear a hairnet while driving with windows down - especially on the freeway. I had tried wearing motorcycle goggles, and they kept the hair out of my eyes very well, but I got all sorts of rude gestures and comments from other motorists. So, hairnet it is. They can't see it from 10 feet away.

P.S. I miss my Honda Del Sol with top in the trunk. 300,000 miles and fond memories.

Hugs,

Bernice

[Bernice]

By now the hair is a little bit longer than in the wig in my avatar photo. Still shorter in front, but also partway down my back. Needs a trim or blunt cut.

Since I still have to go places en drab, I don't dare cut bangs. It's a pain because I keep breaking hairs before the ponytail holder, and they fly into my eyes or mouth. Perhaps I should try hairspray?

Hugs,

Bernice

[KimberlyS]

Yea the in between stages of hair can be a pain to deal with. Good luck with continuing to grow it out.

[Michelle Diane]

I am in awe of mother nature - how she figured out how to get hair to work its way into the space behind my glasses, and whip my retinas. Pushing the hair behind my ear doesn't work. It won't stay.

LOL!! oh Bernice I feel your pain. Even when back in a ponytail and hairspray to keep the rest in check somehow some way stray hairs always get behind my glasses. If you come up with a solution patent it, you'll be rich.