How a salesperson feels about crossdressers in their store?

[Loy B(SO)]

Thats great Denise.Glad to hear you had sucj a great experience.Van has been very lucky when hes gone out shopping and has always had friendly sales associates to help him.Its great that there are places that they are that understanding and caring.Kudos to theese people!

[Anthea]

I have done a fair bit of shopping enfemme in the last year, I cannot say If get better or worse service to a GG but what I can say is that I certinly do get much better service in girl mode compared to boy mode.

I have found all sales assistants so far to be friendy and courtious when I am enfemme. They sometime smile at me when I walk by them, and some will chat to me. It never happens in boy mode.

I use the ladies change rooms and restrooms just like any GG and have had no problem or even a hint of dissatisfaction from another GG. I am in there to try on clothes only or go to the toilet and sometimes adjust my makeup in the mirror. In no way am I in there to look at woman as I try to respect every ones privacy.

[Veronica Smith]

I've never gone out en femme but I've tried on women's clothing when dressed as a guy in many different stores, including:
Lane Bryant ( 4 different stores, including one bra fitting)
Fashion Bug
Dress Barn
Catherines
JC Penney
Kohls
Target
Payless Shoes
Leggs Hanes Bali (had a bra fitting and tried on bras)
some small local stores

I've never been refused and usually been treated just like any other customer. I've often been there with many other women shoppers in the store.

[SilverLady(SO)]

Hi, JJ - and welcome to the Forum!

Just a suggestion, but you should head over to the New Members section, start a thread and say hello to everyone, and you'll get a warm welcome from the members.

Either way, we we're looking forward to your participation, so don't be shy!!

- SL

[Tekla]

If you are in Cali, try Macy's, they do train the sales people in CD, as a part of their general diversity program. I always get top drawer service in the downtown SF flagship store.

I find the small, independent boutiques to be good too. More personal service, fewer people to contend with, and more dependent on a single sale than a department store is. They also tend to know every piece they carry in stock, which can be a plus. And they tend to a single style or two, so you don't have to work through all the "I wouldn't be seen dead in that stuff" that department stores have to carry.

And, at least here, nothing beats the Goodwill flagship store at Van Ness between Mission and Market. DKNY pants suit, macys tag still on it = $16. I paid $35 for a wedding dress for a costume party. The store is so big, the volume so heavy, that its like the stock is rotating every few days. Not to mention that they have all the "oh my god I've always wanted that dress" stuff from long ago. If nothing else, you can at least try it on and see what it looks like on you. I go in every time I'm passing by it (and its on the biggest intersection in town) cause, "ya never know."

Just going in and trying things on has been an education for me. Too many CDs tend to look a bit 'wrong' because they make fashion mistakes that girls are trained early not to make. We tend to go for things we desire, not what makes us look good - and all too often we have not been trained in what makes us look good, in how to critically see what we are looking at in the mirror. And we don't have a gang of friends with us going "Ewww" when we hold it up. But largely we have not - like many girls have by the time they hit 16 - tried on just about every piece or clothing in the world (or so it seems). That what it takes, practice, practice, practice - to change your mind around from shopping in a 'that looks cute' mode, to thinking of every item in terms of 'does that make me look cute.' You are buying it, not because you like the item, but because the item looks good on you - and even better, if the item makes you look better.

Heck, I even met my best TG friend digging through the racks there. In San Francisco, the first CD tourist stop should be this store. For the price of one outfit at Macy's (which is half an outfit at Bloomies, and a pair of sox at Nordstroms, and I don't even go into Neiman-Marcus, because the prices make me faint) you can walk out with a wardrobe.

[Marda]

As a former ladies qwear store manager, I can tell you that I had sales associates working for me ranging in age from late teens through early 50s and any of them were capable of giving me ttrouble or being rude and disrepectful to customers, except the ones who semed to naturally have a good work ethic and a healthy outlook on life ... and most of them were unsure of themselves when dealing with an apparent (obvious? cder) and it was partly my job to ensure that there were no unhappy "fitting room events for anybody ... by doing a bit of traffic control ... I was lucky to recruit or inherit a couple of really fine and mature sales associates who were "stellar" in customer service and who made life easier for both customers and for me ... all in all, it was a tough job in a tough environment and I had no support at all from my boss, the company and many of my employees ... one of the greatest disappointments was to discover how big the shoplifting problem was, including women who trained their children how to steal and women who worked in teams to steal ... no kidding ... in my case, it was up to me to train my staff in the areas of floor duties and customer service, with no support from the company or my boss (regional manager) who was only concerned with sales numbers .... possibly because I was a cder, I considered myself to be especially interested in serving all groups of customers, but none were more difficult than cranky GGs , especially like
the ones who complained about a male managing a ladies wear store
or the ones who would complain with hopes of me wanting to buy peace by giving them free gift certificates as a reward for complaining ...
I've faced some nasty situations but cders were usually very pleasant to deal with ... in some cases, I had staff who were very good at wardrobing and advising customers on styles and fitting and coordinating
sometimes, I've even thought how I may even enjoy retail clothing service again if I could serve only cds
when you go into a store, go to look or shop, not to steal or cause trouble
and depending on the store, it may help to communicate with the manager about your interest in trying on and shopping ... also, checking out the return policy is good advice as above...

remember the old saying;"when thegoing gets tough, the tough go shopping
shop ongals
Marda

[Azurielle]

I usually go around the issue entirely by shopping in Walmarts and Costcos, saves you the trouble of going through a middleman for the dressing rooms and also offers the possibility of being nticed LESS than in more private stores. Effectively, when shopping (and not trying on, because you can try the clothes later) you are barely noticed in peak shopping hours and sales.

I was shopping in the girls' aisles on boxing day and everyone was so rushed they didn't even notice. Even the cashier was so rushed she just scanned my credit card and didn't even ive me the usual glare.

[Tasi]

When I first started going to the ladies stores, I was advised to call in advance. I did several times and several times not, but I found that by contacting the manager in advance, I got extraordinary service; not only courteous, but most helpful in selecting clothes, and always treated as a lady. Since I'm a 26/28, I favor Fashion Bug and Lane Bryant. But above all, I just have a lot of fun trying on beautiful clothes. Makes one want to be a woman full time

[Roberta-Llyan]

The big thing I found, is be confident, and act like it is normal to be shopping for ladies clothes, and act like any other lady would.

Denise

Well said. There is no other way to do it. Act as if you belong and do what is proper--and you will fit right in. That's been my experience since going 24/7--act as a lady and behave as a lady and people treat me like a lady in stores where I shop.

[Janet Bern]

For those of us that are over 6ft, I cant say enough about how the Tall Girls Shop is the best place in the world for us. They have about 10 to 20% CD customers and whether you are enfemme or endrab they help you try on and fit you to the clothes you like. A wide variety of tastes in clothes and when we go out enfemme we dont feel like we settled for clothes that dont fit as well as we would like. Check the website Tall girls shop and see if a shop is located near you. I cant wait to go back..
Janet

[Deidre Taylor]

As a girl who has been out since 1979 and now FT 3 1/2 years I can tell you attitudes toward the crossdressing world has vastly improved over the years. Yes I have had bad experiences, still do at certain stores but then again I have seen store employees be just plain rude to GG's as well. In today's society and economy stores are looking for all the sales they can get and I would doubt many if any would refuse a crossdresser an opportunity to try something on.

I can say that if you want acceptance try to blend in, please note I did not say be passable but rather blend in. I was in Kohl's just the other day in the ligerie department and there was a crossdresser who needed to learn what it is like to fit in. It was the middle of a Tuesday ar Wednesday afternoon, not sure what day exactly, and I like many of the other women there was casually attired. This girl had on a leather mini, 4" spike heels, and a sequined top. Gurls if you want to be treated like ladies try to present a ladylike image.

[Willie W]

I was at Marshalls dept. store the other day. I had decided I wanted some women's jeans but I wasn't sure of my size. I took 3 pair to the fitting rooms. They had a woman who handed out numbers and let you into the rooms. I wasn't expecting that. But I went ahead and tried on the jeans and found the pair I wanted. As I exited the fitting room this woman asked me to leave the items I didn't want with her. As I handed her the clothes she remarked that these were women's jeans. I said yes, I know and just walked away. It was a little embarassing, but not so bad. This was my first time trying on clothes in the store.

[Georgia(SO)]

Off hand, in this economy, I would think any salesperson would be thrilled to see anyone that had cash and wanted to spend it!

-g(so)

[Jodie Wexler]

There is one woman's store close to me that is so CD friendly that they even used my pictures in their Holiday store display and have a picture of me in a dress I got there hanging up in the fitting room. They have a lot of CD customers from what the owner tells me. The store is in Northampton, MA and is named Ultra-gal and they are very welcoming.
Jodie

[Gwen Lee]

My neice worked in a Victoria Secret store while in college and she remarked once about guys who came in to buy lingerie for themselves. She loved it, because they usually bought more than the average customer.