I'm not sure I'm in the right place to get an unbiased opinion, but anything will help.
I'm a 25 year old, 6'3" rugby player,(your typical jock) strugling with an ongoing desire to buy and wear womens clothing. I'm especially fond of lingerie and sleepwear.
I resent these feelings and don't like having a secretive 'alter-ego'. I hate hiding this from trusted friends and loved ones, but what would they think of me? It just doesn't work!
Can anyone help me?
Can Anyone Help Me. I'm all confused.
Moderators: KimberlyS, Eileen (SO)
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TaraCD
- Miss Crystal Goddess
- Posts: 24
- Joined: Fri Mar 19, 2004 6:20 am
- Location: NSW, Australia
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Beauty
- Retired Site Administrator
- Posts: 3662
- Joined: Thu Aug 14, 2003 4:30 am
- Location: Northern VA
- Contact:
Hi Tara,
I am tall too.
Don't worry about the friends thing yet because it doesn't sound like you have things resolved with yourself yet.
There is lots of help already in the 10,000 articles we have on the site, but there will be others who will help you, including me hopefully.
I do have a friend of mine who is also a Rugby player and she is transgendered. There's NOTHING wrong with you. You have to believe that. We're just different not sick.
Please feel free to ask any questions you may have here.
Best of luck as you learn to accept yourself.
Beauty
I am tall too.
Don't worry about the friends thing yet because it doesn't sound like you have things resolved with yourself yet.
There is lots of help already in the 10,000 articles we have on the site, but there will be others who will help you, including me hopefully.
I do have a friend of mine who is also a Rugby player and she is transgendered. There's NOTHING wrong with you. You have to believe that. We're just different not sick.
Please feel free to ask any questions you may have here.
Best of luck as you learn to accept yourself.
Beauty
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TaraCD
- Miss Crystal Goddess
- Posts: 24
- Joined: Fri Mar 19, 2004 6:20 am
- Location: NSW, Australia
helping already
Well, I can't believe what a huge and fast impact this site is having on me. After reading a few other posts, I am really starting to relate. I think I am begining to realise that I don't have to stop being the man I am, I jsut need to embrace the woman I sometimes pretend to be, I guess she is actually part of me.
Thanks already, things are looking are.
Tara
Don't die wondering!
Thanks already, things are looking are.
Tara
Don't die wondering!
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Beauty
- Retired Site Administrator
- Posts: 3662
- Joined: Thu Aug 14, 2003 4:30 am
- Location: Northern VA
- Contact:
Hi again Tara,
You are right!
This site helps lots of people to come to the same realization you just had. The members are the folks who make that all possible.
We have a very, very supportive group here!
Let us know as you grow more!! It will be very interesting to hear how you develop.
Don't get down if you hit a bump and feel, "Ya' know what? No matter how much I read, I feel this is still wrong." Even that thought is normal. If you decide that this too much go away from it, don't resist the urge to leave it all, but keep enough room open that coming back wouldn't be that bad either.
I hope that made sense!
Beauty
You are right!
This site helps lots of people to come to the same realization you just had. The members are the folks who make that all possible.
We have a very, very supportive group here!
Let us know as you grow more!! It will be very interesting to hear how you develop.
Don't get down if you hit a bump and feel, "Ya' know what? No matter how much I read, I feel this is still wrong." Even that thought is normal. If you decide that this too much go away from it, don't resist the urge to leave it all, but keep enough room open that coming back wouldn't be that bad either.
I hope that made sense!
Beauty
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Virginia
- Goddess of the Universe
- Posts: 5543
- Joined: Tue Feb 24, 2004 4:06 pm
- Location: Strange Magic Hill
Tara: Honey, if you read some of the medical research that some of our sisters have posted, it basically comes down to the fact that (1) we were basically born this way. Some 54 or 57 genes affect our feminine side so they are there and we ain't gittin rid of them. (2) we are just wired (brain-wise) different and in my considered opinion BETTER than our unfortunate brethern who don't have a clue! I enjoy dressing and going out in public. For me one reason as a competitive powerl lifter, it is a challenge and I have never walked away from a challenge. So far I have passed, actually I look good as a blonde. But as I have progressed and the ladies on this forum have posted, I began to see beyond the challenges and just let my feminine side sort of take over, It's GREAT! So just go with the flow and you'll have a great time!! Love, Deborah
First star to the right, then straight on 'till mornin!
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Kersten Lee
- Miss Platinum Goddess
- Posts: 386
- Joined: Sun Feb 29, 2004 10:05 am
- Location: Central Nebraska
TaraCD,
Beauty and Deborah are right. It's taken me 40 years to find and
accept myself. I am a man but also love being feminine. These
are separate and yet intertwined. It's nice you are seeking at a
young age. I wish you will become comfortable much sooner than I.
You can save a lot of worry and self hate and start enjoying your whole
place in life sooner than I. I lost so many years in pain. People here
are just a wonderful bunch of human beings as we all believe you to be.
In the mean time, Be easy on yourself and don't struggle to hard to
know everything at once.
Kersten
Beauty and Deborah are right. It's taken me 40 years to find and
accept myself. I am a man but also love being feminine. These
are separate and yet intertwined. It's nice you are seeking at a
young age. I wish you will become comfortable much sooner than I.
You can save a lot of worry and self hate and start enjoying your whole
place in life sooner than I. I lost so many years in pain. People here
are just a wonderful bunch of human beings as we all believe you to be.
In the mean time, Be easy on yourself and don't struggle to hard to
know everything at once.
Kersten
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Kyra
- Miss Ruby Goddess
- Posts: 1161
- Joined: Tue Jan 13, 2004 11:04 pm
- Location: Fort Fun, CO
- Contact:
Well Tara,
In my (very biased) opinion, I am who I am. I've had self doubts. I've even hated this part of me. (Because it wasn't "normal") I did some real soul searching, and I do mean real searching...a lot of sitting at night thinking 'what if' and 'do i'.
I came to the final conclusion that this is part of me. A part that will not go away, and I don't want it to! It would be like cutting off my leg or arm. I need it to function. I need it to be...me.
I am who I am, and I like being me. (I know this sounds repetitive)
This is MY conclusion to a search into my being. Your search may turn up different results, and they are YOUR results. Different, not wrong.
This a direct contradiction to "Normal Strictures" that society places on us. I don't think I have a choice in who I am. I can, however, chose to accept and embrace it. Crossdressing has allowed me to be a better person overall. I am free to explore and just "be" myself, without apprehension.
I am still growing (as a CDer) and will probably continue to do so for the rest of my life.
Well, in a nutshell. that's my take on it. For what it's worth.
Hugs,
Kyra
In my (very biased) opinion, I am who I am. I've had self doubts. I've even hated this part of me. (Because it wasn't "normal") I did some real soul searching, and I do mean real searching...a lot of sitting at night thinking 'what if' and 'do i'.
I came to the final conclusion that this is part of me. A part that will not go away, and I don't want it to! It would be like cutting off my leg or arm. I need it to function. I need it to be...me.
I am who I am, and I like being me. (I know this sounds repetitive)
This is MY conclusion to a search into my being. Your search may turn up different results, and they are YOUR results. Different, not wrong.
This a direct contradiction to "Normal Strictures" that society places on us. I don't think I have a choice in who I am. I can, however, chose to accept and embrace it. Crossdressing has allowed me to be a better person overall. I am free to explore and just "be" myself, without apprehension.
I am still growing (as a CDer) and will probably continue to do so for the rest of my life.
Well, in a nutshell. that's my take on it. For what it's worth.
Hugs,
Kyra
For once you have tasted flight you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skywards, for there you have been and there you will long to return. - Leonardo DaVinci
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Tara
- Miss Silver Goddess
- Posts: 36
- Joined: Tue Mar 02, 2004 9:09 pm
- Location: Reno, Nevada
Oh yay another Tara here, cool!
Tara,
I'm your age too, 24, and I know it can be pretty hard figuring this all out and reconciling it with yourself. There's been many a time on here, or on other CD forums and a lightbulb goes off in my head and I'm like "ha! that's so like me" or "wow, I've never saw it that way before,"
It may seem troubling now, but your one of the lucky one who's come to terms with this early, some CDers don't struggle with it until thier into thier 70's, long after thier married, and sometimes hide it from thier wives fearing what the reaction of thier SO's might be (sometimes with good reason).
But this is a great place to learn about other people and yourself, I wish you luck on your journey.
Tara
Tara,
I'm your age too, 24, and I know it can be pretty hard figuring this all out and reconciling it with yourself. There's been many a time on here, or on other CD forums and a lightbulb goes off in my head and I'm like "ha! that's so like me" or "wow, I've never saw it that way before,"
It may seem troubling now, but your one of the lucky one who's come to terms with this early, some CDers don't struggle with it until thier into thier 70's, long after thier married, and sometimes hide it from thier wives fearing what the reaction of thier SO's might be (sometimes with good reason).
But this is a great place to learn about other people and yourself, I wish you luck on your journey.
Tara
"(I'm) man enough to be a woman."--- Jayne County
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Amber(SO)
- Miss Emerald Goddess
- Posts: 127
- Joined: Thu Jan 15, 2004 12:17 am
- Location: Fort Fun, CO
TaraCD,
I'm a CDs wife and can understand your confusion and fear. You are probably thinking right now, "why me?" Consider this a blessing in disguise. You will be much more able to be in touch with your emotions and ultimately with the feminine side of yourself. Many people would consider this odd or strange, but hopefully you will find those people who will accept this part of you unconditionally. That is your first step...accept yourself, unconditionally. It's very hard when you think that you are strange yourself. You are going to have to open up your mind, and realize that you are not a run of the mill person, but very special. Read some of the posts here and you will find several commonalities between most CDs here. 1.) They are extremely intellegent 2.) They are very sensitive and loving 3.) They are beautiful inside and out. Consider yourself among the elite!
Good luck in your quest to find yourself.
XOXO, Amber
I'm a CDs wife and can understand your confusion and fear. You are probably thinking right now, "why me?" Consider this a blessing in disguise. You will be much more able to be in touch with your emotions and ultimately with the feminine side of yourself. Many people would consider this odd or strange, but hopefully you will find those people who will accept this part of you unconditionally. That is your first step...accept yourself, unconditionally. It's very hard when you think that you are strange yourself. You are going to have to open up your mind, and realize that you are not a run of the mill person, but very special. Read some of the posts here and you will find several commonalities between most CDs here. 1.) They are extremely intellegent 2.) They are very sensitive and loving 3.) They are beautiful inside and out. Consider yourself among the elite!
Good luck in your quest to find yourself.
XOXO, Amber
A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.