THE OFFICIAL: What Are You Doing Now? - #2

[Cassandra Lynn]

Shouldn't eat chocolate Kiera? Are you mad? Then give it all to me for crissakes!

Ok, so i posted already, neener neener..............

[Karin]

Having a look around again.... Been feeling offish for a while, so I haven't been online..anywhere while I do some serious searching of myself. I'm still non the wiser lol. Anyhoo, today the urge to be nosey just 'kicked back in' so here I am, been nosey!

[Anthony Simon]

Welcome back, Karin.

... while I do some serious searching of myself. I'm still non the wiser lol.

Yeah, I know that space...(or think I do)...kind of like you don't feel you're getting anywhere and suddenly, one day, you are...

[Karin]

Thanks Anthony,

Yeah exactly kinda sortve like that hahaha. I mean I just found out I'm not type 2 diabetic, but I'm not type 1 either. Get this.... Me is an inbetweeny hahahahaha. Funny thing is it seemed to be under control quite well, you think everything's sorted, and then boom it all goes and changes on you and stuff doesn't work anymore. So then they say stop taking the meds for a week ( which ends tomorrow) and then you start insulin injections instead. And here I am, the night before I start, no meds and.....my sugars are great?! Makes no sense whatsoever. All this comes at a time of emotional shift for me. (the second wave of 'acceptance' complications). Now I know this is totally absurd, my family all support me without a doubt, people at work have called me out on been transexual and don't really seem to care, I've never had one single unpleasant exchange with anyone, so how come at this stage I come unstuck on accepting myself? All the while carrying on my HRT cos I know it's right for me, yet bawling regularly into the mirror asking this one question....

Why?

Now if I could answer that, Itd be really nice to be me.. For now tho, I think my gender may possibly be like my diabetes, I'm not type 2, nor type 1 eh? My gender is 1.5 I think...

What a ramble

[Anthony Simon]

Thanks Anthony,

Yeah exactly kinda sortve like that hahaha. I mean I just found out I'm not type 2 diabetic, but I'm not type 1 either. Get this.... Me is an inbetweeny hahahahaha.

Me, I've come to the conclusion I'm inbetweeny as far as being a man or being a woman. So...

Funny thing is it seemed to be under control quite well, you think everything's sorted, and then boom it all goes and changes on you and stuff doesn't work anymore. So then they say stop taking the meds for a week ( which ends tomorrow) and then you start insulin injections instead. And here I am, the night before I start, no meds and.....my sugars are great?! Makes no sense whatsoever. All this comes at a time of emotional shift for me. (the second wave of 'acceptance' complications).

Well, that's what I was thinking. It's not a straight physical thing with you the diabetes, but your emotions play into it. I've not got diabetes, but I do have the regular knack of winding myself up so whatever symptoms I've got (of whatever) get worse when I don't want them to (and sometimes better when I don't want them to!).

Emotional shift...I really hate change myself, am no good at it. So...my heart goes out to you...

Now I know this is totally absurd, my family all support me without a doubt, people at work have called me out on been transexual and don't really seem to care, I've never had one single unpleasant exchange with anyone, so how come at this stage I come unstuck on accepting myself?

The thing I've always wondered about you is whether the guy part of you is really dead. I know you've said it is, but I always have this doubt.

All the while carrying on my HRT cos I know it's right for me, yet bawling regularly into the mirror asking this one question....

Why?

Now if I could answer that, Itd be really nice to be me.. For now tho, I think my gender may possibly be like my diabetes, I'm not type 2, nor type 1 eh? My gender is 1.5 I think...

What a ramble

Yeah, 1.5, that'll really confuse people....Including you...

[Leeza]

I missed seeing you, Karin.

I hope you get it all figures out. Being 1.5 reminds me of a song http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t6iNbigm3X4" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[Karin]

I missed seeing you, Karin.

I hope you get it all figures out. Being 1.5 reminds me of a song http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t6iNbigm3X4" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Hiya Leeza Thankyou for that, it's good to see you too . I can't get that link to work on my iPad thingy here waaah but yeah, definately feeling a 1.5 tonight lol

Hey Anthony, I'll pick this up in my beginnings thread if I can find it so as not to hog this one if that's ok? But you got me now, I'm dying to know what makes you wonder if he's gone? I mean what's the tell really. How do we know if we are female with a few male traits due to the body we inherit, or if we are... Well.. Bipolar? I went the mpd route for a while, then thought nah, I'm just one entity with a few traits of the opposite brain gender. How do we really know what gender our brains are?
If you can answer that oric, I'll make you a cuppa hahaha

[Cassandra Lynn]

Hiya stranger (then i anyways...neener neener), nice to see ya.
Best of luck with the diabetes and whatever else is on your brain.......1.5 huh, knowing ya like i do, that does make alot of sense.

Me? Just stopping in for my weekly looksy, tho i really must get over to the job search area of this blasted pooter. 2 days a week of madness at what was my summer job is kinda nice but doesn't pay the bills.
And after the first of the month, i'm officially laid off, so uhhhh yeah.

[Karin]

Hey sweetie

Yep, imagine my surprise at being called a neither here nor there inbetweeny. Who would have thunk it . Now when you've finished making us dinner, I'm here to natter xxx

Btw, what we having?

[Karin]

Drying off from a mega hot bath with new razors....ahhh yep

Now watching a show where loads of people in one town 'caught' torrettes syndrome?!

Bow count down to FOUR right now, but the weekends nearly here

[Anna]

Hi Karin. Great to have you here again, hope your diabetes in now under control, hun.

Have a welcome-back and a

[Karin]

Hey Anna,

Been a while eh? Meh it's kinda under control, some of the time gah. Was sposed to start insulin this week, but when we cut the meds prior to starting, it didn't rocket up this time, so no insulin for now, this is good, but I'm always tiiiiired, which sucks, but hey, it won't kill me this week lol

Hope you're doing good?, nice to see you, and back at ya xx

[Latanya]

hi Karin great to her from u
read ur latest on hear and sorry u having some emotional issues
how u been girl?

[Karin]

Hey Anya, have a

Yeah, been a bit hormonal lately, I've decided to let the t count rise a bit as a result. Things were getting a bit emotional as you put it. Mind you, my t levels were pretty battered, scoring near the lowest on the normal female range lmao. Turns out we need at least a few of them things swimming around inside to function Soooo, I've issued visas for just a few more t's - not many, to come back for a few weeks.

So there ya go... What you been up to then?

[Latanya]

well i am off hormones now completely
found out the new studies increased estrogen with decreased T's causes enlargement of the prostate not shrinkage!
AND i am sure that is what is happening so i hope i can reverse some of it!
haven been here much but if u are back here i will be really miss u